


Jasmine Tea and Coffee Kisses

by Antarctica_or_bust



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies)
Genre: Adorable Kíli, Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - Flower Shop, Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Bilbo is Flustered, Both of their families are insane, Crack, Developing Relationship, Family Feels, Family Reunions, Fluff, Kidnapping, Kíli is Cheeky, Kíli rides a motorcycle, Leather is hot, Lobelia is a Nutcase, M/M, Pining, Ridiculous levels of fluff, Romance, Slow Build, These two can't do anything normally, Thorin is a Softie, Thranduil is a vegan chef but Legolas loves bacon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-22
Updated: 2013-09-27
Packaged: 2017-12-09 05:27:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 27,375
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/770523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Antarctica_or_bust/pseuds/Antarctica_or_bust
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Coffee Shop AU.</p><p>Kili starts working in his uncle Thorin's café to earn some cash while he's in college.  Bilbo owns the flower shop next door and comes in every day at the same time for tea and a muffin.</p><p>Flirting and romance ensue.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. First Impressions

**Author's Note:**

> Every pairing needs one right? And I need something fluffier to work on when I can't deal with my angsty WIPs anymore.  
> Unlike most of my fics this one will have many shorter chapters instead of fewer long ones, and we'll see how that works out.
> 
> Comments, speculation and constructive criticism always welcome.

The new barista was terribly distracting and Bilbo finally set down his clippers with a sigh, knowing that he wouldn't get any more work done before he found out who that was. 

Normally he didn't mind the large glass panels in the wall between his florist shop and the coffee shop next door and in fact they had been rather good for business. Ever since Cafe Erebor moved in, Bilbo's sales had skyrocketed because nothing seemed to remind people that they needed love or forgiveness like staring at a bouquet of roses with coffee in their hands.

However, from the moment that he came into Baggins' Bouquets that Monday morning, Bilbo had been able to see the new employee walking around out of the corner of his eye and it was driving him crazy. 

Although no sound crossed the wall between the shops, the young man was visibly bright and cheerful even when wiping down tables and Bilbo had always been too curious for his own good. So when the morning coffee rush was over, he finally he gave in and turned his sign around before ducking next door to meet the new arrival.

The bell rang with a gentle chime as he entered the cafe and Thorin looked up, giving him a nod when he saw who it was. When the florist had first met his new neighbor, the older man had terrified him since he wasn't given much to talking or to smiles. However, Bilbo eventually learned that this massive exterior hid a gentle heart and now he considered Thorin something of a friend. A silent, glowering, strangely attractive friend, but a friend nonetheless.

So Bilbo correctly interpreted the man's raised eyebrow as a question and shrugged in response, “It's been a slow morning so I thought I would get my tea early and meet your new hire while I'm at it.”

He didn't bother to order since Thorin knew his usual, instead sitting at a small corner table by the window where he could watch the street flow by. Now that all the early morning commuters had gone on their way, the coffee shop was nice and quiet with only a few other customers sitting hunched over their laptops in the back.

Bilbo lost track of time as he watched the pedestrians scurry past outside and so he jumped slightly when a cheerful voice spoke by his elbow. “Your order, sir.”

When he turned to look, Thorin's new employee was standing there, smiling down at him with the warmest brown eyes that he had ever seen. He was tall, at least a few inches taller than the florist but probably a few years younger judging by the irrepressible grin on his face. The new barista was also far too attractive in the same irritatingly oblivious way as Thorin, and Bilbo blushed when he realized he was staring.

“Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you,” the younger man apologized, setting a plate and cup down on the table. “Uncle always used to say that I walk like a fox.”

“Um, what?” the florist stammered, somewhat confused by this seeming non sequitur and distracted by the truly astounding dimples in the other's cheeks.

“Thorin over there is my uncle and he says I need to walk louder to avoid startling our customers, though considering how much I talk that's not usually a problem,” he explained, waving towards the older man behind the counter and giving Bilbo a wink. “Do you mind if I sit?”

“Um no, go ahead,” he replied in surprise, taking a sip of his tea while he regained his composure. “Though I hope you don't ask all your customers that.”

“Of course not,” the barista said, sliding into the chair across from Bilbo with a grin. “You're special.”

His voice was so sincere that the florist found himself blushing again and he hid his embarrassment behind another drink of tea. “Special?”

“Yup, you work next door right? Boggin's Bouquets? So obviously we should get to know each other since I'm sure I'll see a lot of you over the coming months.”

“Oh, um, yes that would be me. Though I need to get that sign repainted since it's actually Bilbo Baggins, at your service,” he replied, giving the other man a half bow from his seat and trying to ignore the way that Thorin was watching them from the corner of his eye.

“Killigan Prince at yours, but everyone calls me Kíli because Killigan is a stupid name and it takes too long to yell,” Thorin's nephew introduced himself with a bow of his own and Bilbo had to blink against the young man's blinding smile. “Although you might have me beaten there, even if it isn't Boggins, what were your parents thinking?”

The bluntness of the question caught the florist off guard and he faltered for a moment as he tried to think of a response. However, Kíli waited patiently for him to speak and eventually Bilbo managed to spit an answer out, snark overcoming his surprise. “Well, my father said they meant to name me Balbo after his grandfather, but the doctor couldn't read his handwriting. What's your excuse?”

“Oh I don't have one, my mother's just crazy like that. At least she married out so we weren't stuck with Durin like the rest. But she named my brother Fílipek so I count myself lucky that I got the Irish phase. Actually the whole family's like that if you haven’t noticed,” Kíli retorted with another laugh before leaning forward on the table and asking under his breath. “So tell me the truth, does uncle Thorin scare the crap out of you?”

“I, what? Why don't you ever ask any normal questions?” Bilbo asked in bemusement, the other's conspiratorial expression making him grin behind his hand.

However, the younger man just leaned back, his long limbs sprawling across his chair in a manner that the florist found disconcertingly attractive. “Where's the fun in that? I already know your name and where you work, and considering that Baggins is printed on the door, I'm pretty sure you run the place. Besides, this question made you smile didn't it?”

“Well I suppose it did,” the florist had to admit, “But that's not the normal way people get to know each other. I don't even know why you're here.”

“Because I work here,” Kíli teased and the older man huffed in annoyance when he blushed again, “Oh you know what I meant.”

“Of course I do but normal is boring and I have to leave some mystery to keep you coming back, don't I? However, if you really must know, I'm in the masters program up at UH and uncle was kind enough to give me a job while I'm in school.”

“A job you should be doing,” Thorin called over as another customer walked through the door and his nephew hopped up at his request.

“Sorry Bilbo, duty calls. But I'll see you around and I expect you to answer my question next time,” Kíli said cheerfully, giving a little wave as he walked back to the register. 

The florist nodded absently, watching the younger man even as he tore his cranberry muffin in half and nibbled on the corner. He knew that he should get back to the shop soon but he wanted a moment to collect his thoughts first since no one had managed to fluster him that badly in years. Although, if Bilbo was honest with himself, it may have more to do with the warmth of Kíli's smiles than the teasing and next time he was resolved to hold his own.

He finished his muffin and left his payment on the table, nodding to Thorin and his nephew on his way out of the door. If the florist was slightly distracted for the rest of the day then no one called him on it and if they had, he could always have blamed it on the last minute order of six dozen gardenias that filled up his afternoon.


	2. Second Thoughts

On Tuesday, Bilbo waited until his normal time before stepping out for tea and when he walked into Cafe Erebor, he told himself he wasn't disappointed that Kíli wasn't there. Instead, one of Thorin's usual employees, a boisterous redhead called Bombur whom the florist thought was some manner of cousin was standing behind the counter mixing drinks. 

However, when he went up to the counter to pay for his standard order he found himself asking, “Is Kíli not in today?”

“'Fraid not, had some registration stuff to deal with. But he should be back tomorrow and then he'll be working mornings Monday thru Friday and some weekends to fit around his classes,” Bombur told him cheerfully as he handed the florist his change. “Do you want me to pass a message on?”

“Oh no, that's all right,” Bilbo refused, embarrassed to think that Kíli would find out that he had asked. “I was just curious.”

The florist quickly turned the conversation to more innocuous topics, chatting with Bombur about his day until his tea was ready. Then he took his mug and his muffin and walked over to his standard table to perform his daily ritual. 

However, for the first time since he started coming to Cafe Erebor, Bilbo felt as though something was missing and after a while, he couldn't take it anymore. 

_This is ridiculous_ , he told himself, frustrated with his own stupid thoughts. _You had one conversation and you barely got a word in edgewise because you were too distracted by Kíli's truly ridiculous dimples. You cannot seriously be pining already._

Indeed, Bilbo refused to believe this was the problem. Instead, he decided that it had simply been too long since he had dated and he was reading interest into what was just a friendly chat. 

_Kíli will be here next time and once I actually manage to have a proper conversation, I'm sure I'll see that our connection wasn't special. He's just interesting, and playful and far too pretty for his own good and I only got flustered because I never actually go out. So it's really not a crush at all._

The more Bilbo told himself this, the thinner the argument sounded even in his own mind so it was actually a relief when Thorin sat down across from him; although, the relief was somewhat reduced by the older man's terrifying frown.

“Um, hello?” he squeaked in surprise since the other man had never once sat down with him in all the weeks the florist had been having tea beneath his roof. They were friends yes, but not usually the kind that hung out or had deep discussions, more the sort that nodded from afar.

“You seemed to be getting along with my nephew yesterday,” Thorin said, staring at Bilbo intently and the florist flushed beneath his steady gaze.

“I...yes, we were. He seems like a nice lad,” he replied hesitantly, feeling as if the older man could read his indecent thoughts right off his face.

But Thorin just smiled fondly at his words and Bilbo could tell that he loved his nephew dearly. “That he is and he'll be your friend if you want him.”

“You'd approve of that?” the florist asked in surprise, unsure why the other man was talking to him if not to warn him off.

“Of course I would. My nephew is old enough to make his own decisions, even if he does always assume the best of everyone, and he doesn't need me chasing his friends off. In fact, you might be good for him because Kíli has always been a flighty one and he could stand to learn some responsibility from your example. That said, if you do hurt him somehow, I promise I will make your life a living hell.”

There was the terrifying Thorin he'd expected and Bilbo quickly nodded his agreement beneath the other man's ferocious stare. _See, that's one good reason right there to nip my crush in the bud,_ he told himself as the cafe's owner stood up and walked away to greet another customer. 

_Kíli sounds like he just flirts with everyone and even if he does like me, I'm hardly the type for one night stands._ In fact, the florist was a serial monogamist, although he'd gone off dating for several years after one too many unfaithful bastards broke his heart. So there was no point in risking either Thorin's wrath or his own sorrow by taking Kíli too seriously, and he resolved to just relax, have fun, and see how things played out.

With this decision made, Bilbo found that he was finally able to appreciate his meal and he sent Bombur a smile on his way back out the door. 

Baggins' Bouquets was unexpectedly crowded that afternoon so the florist was kept busy making flower arrangements while he took phone orders and reminded old Mr. Boffin yet again that his wife was deathly allergic to begonias. Although Kíli crossed his mind occasionally over the hours, usually when someone brought in their coffee from Cafe Erebor, these were casual thoughts and Bilbo was sure that being nothing more than friends would be just fine.

At least he was sure until he walked into the coffee shop and saw Kíli standing there again.


	3. A Disastrous Morning

This second meeting actually occurred a week after the first because fate seemed to be conspiring to keep Bilbo from his tea at every turn

First, the florist was startled from sleep early on Wednesday by a shrilly ringing phone. When he answered it with a groan, the woman on the other end of the line declared that she had eloped to the islands and wouldn't be back for a month. Through his sleep-filled haze Bilbo recognized the voice of his flower delivery woman but she hung up before he could get a word out in reply.

Her news made him shoot up in panic since the florist didn't own a car and without Maribelle, he had no way to pick up his stock at all. While he might be okay that morning, his shop was running low on a number of popular flowers and the more delicate species needed to be bought fresh every day.

In fact, Bilbo had thought about hiring a second deliveryman for emergencies and holidays before but Baggins' Bouquets was such a small business that he had never been able to justify the expense. So he tumbled out of bed with cost analyses running through his mind, and the florist was all set to head into work until he saw the rain pouring down outside, decided that it was a sign, and went back to sleep instead.

Once he finally did get up, the rest of the day was spent calling other drivers and flower sellers, trying to find someone who could pick up Maribelle's slack. However, it seemed that she had bailed on everyone and all the usual deliverymen were already booked by larger florists that could afford to keep them standing by. 

Bilbo's frustration grew with every unsuccessful phone call and by the time he got his tenth rejection, he was nearly growling into the speaker as he slammed it down in disgust. While business had been good lately, there were always bills to pay and the florist needed to stay open to keep himself in the black.

 _Crap, I think I have to call Gandalf after all,_ he thought in dismay, dreading the coming conversation. The old man was a friend of his parents who had been around as long as Bilbo could remember but didn't seem to age and while the florist was sure that Gandalf could not be his real name, he had never learned another.

If anyone could find someone willing to deliver flowers last minute, it was him; the old man had contacts with all sorts of people and was a wizard at creating miracles. However, Gandalf was also an old busybody who was far too interested in the state of Bilbo's love life and firmly believed that he should get back out there to find romance once again.

 _I don't know why he's so keen on me dating again when he's the one who's had to comfort me after every broken heart. Oh my god, I need more friends..._

The florist was momentarily distracted by the horrifying realization that his best friend might actually be an old man at least four times his age who had known his **parents**. While Bilbo did have other people whom he was glad to see, Gandalf was the only one he could call at any hour of the night in order to bitch about the latest jackass who had left him high and dry.

_Okay fine, maybe I deserve the lecture since I apparently don't have a life. I'll listen to it this time but if he says I told you so, I'm hanging up and perhaps Kíli will save me from ever having to hear those words again._

So Bilbo gathered his courage before dialing the old man's number and indeed the conversation went exactly as he thought. The old man was glad to hear from him, greeting him cheerfully before starting in on his life choices and it was nearly half an hour before the florist managed to turn the discussion toward the actual reason that he'd called.

However, when he finally did, Gandalf came through once again, saying that he knew a guy whose brother had a van and a desperate need for work, and was sure that the fellow would be happy to oblige.

“Nori's a nice man, just a little down on his luck, and his older brother asked me to keep an ear open for any such opportunities. I'll give him a call after I'm done with you and then let you know what he says, but he should be able to start this week. However, don't think this means that I've let you off the hook about starting to date people again. I know you love your flower shop but the world's out there, Bilbo, and you're going to miss it if you're not careful.”

The florist promised to think about Gandalf's words as he always did, although this time he actually meant it. While he certainly had no intention of throwing himself back into dating willy-nilly, the last few days had convinced Bilbo that it might be time to test the waters once again. Cautiously for sure, but once he had this crisis dealt with, he would dip a toe in and see what it was like.

Of course, even once the old man called back and said that Nori would meet him Friday, things were not so easy as all that.


	4. Unwelcome Guests

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't even know any more, just go with it. Go with the crack.

Bilbo woke up at 2am on Thursday to find that the weather had only worsened, the winds of the storm shrieking like a banshee as they whipped around his house. At first the florist wasn't sure what had roused him, but then he heard the silence where there should be glugging and he tumbled out of bed with a vicious curse. 

_It's just one thing after another, isn't it?_ he thought in exasperation, throwing on some clothes and running to the basement. When he got there, the florist found the cellar flooding, four inches of water already on the ground as his sump pump spluttered uselessly in the corner. Bilbo slogged over to it swearing under his breath all the while and groaning when he got close enough to see exactly what was wrong.

 _Figures. It just figures,_ he thought, resigning himself to a long and uncomfortable night manually pumping out the flood. At least the damn thing wasn't broken entirely, but having to sit here working it by hand was not his idea of a good time. 

Several hours later, the sun peeked over the horizon as the storm died down at last and Bilbo stood up with a sigh. _Well that was fun. I better start calling around to get this fixed and maybe if I'm lucky, I can still get into the shop today._

Unfortunately, luck wasn't with him and by the time his sump pump was back in working order, there was no point in opening his doors, especially since most flower sales occurred in the morning anyway. So instead Bilbo went in early the next day to prepare for Nori's arrival, tossing out his wilted flowers and cleaning up the shop. He had just finished filling up the vases for those blooms that had survived when he heard a knock on the door and he went to open it with a smile.

The florist did a double-take when he saw the man waiting in front of his shop since he had never seen such vertical hair nor such an _interesting_ style. However, the man had a kind smile and Bilbo didn't care what he looked like as long as he could drive, so he shook the questions from his mind and greeted the other warmly.

“You would be Nori then? Or do you prefer Mr... I'm sorry, I'm afraid Gandalf never gave me a last name.”

“Just Nori is fine,” the other man replied, shaking his hand firmly. “I understand you're looking for a deliveryman.”

“Yes, yes I am. Thank you so much for coming.” 

The florist pulled Nori inside to explain his new duties and within a few hours, his shop was ready for business once again, shelves covered with flowers in full bloom. Bilbo made a few sales that morning and had just started hoping that he might actually manage to have his tea when the bell over the door jingled.

He looked up and then slumped down with a groan, resting his head despondently against the counter top. _Seriously, could this week get any worse,_ Bilbo wondered as the Sackville-Bagginses swaggered into his shop, gazing around in clear disdain.

“Aren't you supposed to call before you bother me?” he asked his relatives, wondering what exactly he had done to deserve this imposition. 

Lobelia just sneered, somehow able to look down her nose at him despite being the shortest of the bunch. “You don't answer our calls, dear cousin, as you well know. So Otho and I thought we'd treat you to lunch and give you a proper meal for once while we discuss our business.”

Bilbo had an unpleasant feeling about this. There was only one thing his relatives ever wanted from him and the Sackville-Bagginses attempting to be nice was never a good sign. But he had learned from experience that Lobelia did not take no for an answer and refusing would only make them stick around until he changed his mind.

So the florist sighed his agreement, closing his shop yet again and hoping desperately that he managed to get his business back to normal soon. All these disasters were cutting into his bottom line and he was never happy to see his greedy cousins since they wouldn't be satisfied until they had taken all he had.

As he followed them to their car, gaudy and ostentatious like everything they owned, Bilbo looked back at Cafe Erebor wistfully. He could see Thorin setting out fresh muffins in the display and he missed his morning routine desperately. Besides, Kíli hadn't come in yet and the florist doubted his relatives would release him in time to see the young man before his shift was through.

_One of these days, I am going to have my tea again. I swear._

The Sackville-Bagginses drove him into the city for lunch, parking outside of the most extravagant building the florist had ever seen. Lobelia ushered her cousin out of the car and through the doors, barely giving Bilbo enough time to read the cursive script painted on the window.

 _The Greenwood Hall? Isn't that the fancy new vegan restaurant that just opened up?_ the florist wondered as they walked inside and he looked around in awe. All the waiters were tall and blond and snooty, dressed in fine tailored green uniforms that looked like they might actually be silk. Bilbo tried not to gawk as their inhumanly attractive waiter led them to a table in the corner and he tried not to faint when he saw the prices on the menu.

“Don't worry cousin. We said that we'd treat you today; you look like you could use a proper meal for once,” Lobelia told him with false kindness, correctly interpreting the shocked expression on his face and Bilbo went back to his menu with a huff.

_Because this is such a great meal. What is this vegan crap? Soybean spring rolls? Stone-cooked Lembas bread? They don't even have muffins._

A moment after he thought this, the florist was surprised to hear his sentiments echoed out loud as a young voice shouted across the room. “I don't want to cook this vegan crap, father. Gimli's been showing me how to use his barbecue and I think it has a lot of potential.”

Bilbo turned to look for the source of the commotion and saw a pair of men arguing in the corner, both as blond and skinny as the rest. One of them looked to be a teenager or not far from it and while the florist didn't recognize the older man, he heard Lobelia whisper behind him, “That's Thranduil, the head chef and owner. How scandalous, to be fighting in public like that. This restaurant is supposed to be high class.”

Owner or not, Thranduil looked like he was having a bad day, rubbing his forehead in irritation as he glared down at his young son. “We're a vegan restaurant, Legolas. This family has been vegan for generations and you want to throw all that away for what? To impress your common little friend?”

“He's not common, father and you know it,” the teen replied, crossing his arms across his chest and sticking his chin out stubbornly. “The Durins are fine people even if they're not as rich as us and Gimli's not just my friend, he's my boyfriend. We both got accepted to the culinary program at UH and we're going to open a restaurant together when we graduate. One that serves **meat**.”

The older man looked like he was going to pass out from shock at his son's defiance and he sank down into a chair as Legolas stalked out of the building. Bilbo quickly turned away before either of them could see him watching, though the sight of his own relatives did not improve his mood. 

Their waiter must have come by while the florist was distracted because Otho was already drinking and Bilbo was briefly envious of the other man since some alcohol would make this visit slightly easier to swallow. But he needed his wits about him to deal with Lobelia so when their server returned he ordered water instead, along with the most expensive thing off the menu just to annoy her when the bill arrived.

That business dealt with, Bilbo leaned back in his chair and asked with a sigh, “So to what do I owe the pleasure of this visit? The usual I suppose.”

“You make it sound so horrid, cousin. I only want what's best for you and we both know that rattling around that enormous old house of yours isn't it. An apartment would fit you much better: cheaper, easier to clean, closer to your work and of course, that would leave Bag End for us. You know we deserve a place that fits our station.”

The words were different but it was the same argument as always, the same argument they had been giving him ever since his parents died. And as always, Bilbo didn't want to hear it; Bag End belonged to him, it was his inheritance and the last thing he had of his family. While it was a large home for one person, the house was filled with memories and he would never let it fall into the hands of the Sackville-Bagginses, not when they wouldn't love it right.

Lobelia knew his feelings on the matter well since the first time she had brought it up was just after the funeral and Bilbo had rejected her quite harshly. However, despite being literally thrown out of his house on more than one occasion, the Sackville-Bagginses simply would not give up and every few months, they stopped by to bother him again.

They had tried everything: guilt, money, reason and now they were apparently working toward bribery given the restaurant the group was sitting in. Of course, if they actually knew anything about their cousin, they would know that The Greenwood Hall was not the kind of place that would change his mind. So Bilbo picked at his fancy salad, nodding and smiling as Lobelia rambled on and Otho drank himself into a stupor. 

Once lunch was over, the pair would have to drive him back because his cousins would rather die than be overtly impolite, at least when other people were there to hear. So the florist hunkered down and endured their needling and to be honest it was a decent salad, if far too expensive for something made entirely of leaves.

But eventually Bilbo finished his extravagant dessert, ordered to make Lobelia's eyebrows twitch, and convinced his relatives to return him to Baggins' Bouquets. Watching them drive away, the florist sighed, wondering when they'd finally get the hint and leave him alone, or worse, what ridiculous attempt they would make on Bag End next. 

He tried to push these worries from his mind as he turned to reopen his shop one more time and he told himself it was only natural to look at Cafe Erebor long enough to see that Kíli had indeed already left for class. 

_Well there's always next week,_ he thought to himself as he straightened the displays and helped the few customers who wandered in off the street. Bilbo wasn't very busy until the evening, unlike most days the Friday rush always showed up right before closing, and while he normally appreciated the break, today the silence gave him too much time to think.

The combination of Gandalf's scolding and his relatives' visit had the florist feeling pensive, wondering if they were all correct and he actually was wasting away from solitude. It wasn't something he normally thought about since he was generally content with his life, but he did have to admit that Bag End got lonely sometimes.

However, he would see Kíli again soon and the younger man seemed to emit joy like sunshine so if they did become friends, Bilbo knew his life would probably change greatly and he was torn between anticipation and terror at the thought. 

Even though he had decided to just go with the flow at their next meeting, the florist couldn't help but worry that he was getting his hopes up for nothing and he had misread the situation after all. What if Kíli changed his mind about wanting to be friends before they met again or had been less serious in his overtures than Thorin had implied? Maybe he was just that nice to everyone and had already forgotten about the shy man who worked next door in favor of his college life.

And yet, what if he was happy to see Bilbo? What if Kíli meant it all? While this might be the florist's chance to make a friend his own age, his life was comfortable in its familiarity and the thought of breaking out of that protective shell made his heart thunder in his chest.

But he could not deny the hope and he could not stop thinking about the possibilities, whether the two of them became casual acquaintances or friends _or something, **nothing**_ more.


	5. A Second Meeting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As promised, Kíli returns.

With these thoughts spinning round his brain, Bilbo worked himself into quite a state and the days passed by in a blur of nervous anticipation while he waited for the week to start again. Although, when Monday finally came, his hopes had darkened to apprehension and his heart rose in his throat with every step he took toward Baggins' Bouquets that morning.

 _No expectations,_ the florist reminded himself firmly as he unlocked his door. _Expect nothing and it'll be fine. Thorin seems to think that Kíli likes me and if that's true, then being friends would be amazing enough without wishing for anything else. So I'm going to be fun, casual and friendly if it kills me, instead of getting all flustered like I did before._

It was a good pep talk and by the time he walked through the door of Cafe Erebor, Bilbo felt ready to take on anything. In fact, he was feeling so prepared that he walked up to the counter and met Kíli's eyes without fear, before discovering that all words had fled his mind at the warmth he saw within.

“Bilbo! You're back. I was starting to wonder if I had scared you off,” Kíli said, grinning at him brightly and the florist felt some of his doubts ease at the knowledge that the barista was glad to see him after all. However, he still couldn't find the words to greet him, too busy drinking in the sight of the other's features, and Bilbo flushed deeply as he realized that his attraction had definitely not died.

But when another long moment passed without the florist answering his greeting, the barista's smile dimmed and he drew back from the counter with a frown. “Mr. Baggins, are you all right? I- Did I do something wrong? I can be more formal if you prefer,” he asked, worry darkening his eyes, and at the sight of his distress, the florist felt his heart clench uncomfortably. 

The last thing that Bilbo wanted was for Kíli to keep his distance but he didn't know how to say that without sounding like an idiot. So the florist kept silent, keeping his gaze fixed on the counter as he shook his head because he couldn't bear the thought of seeing laughter in the others eyes. 

_I can't believe I'm already screwing this up,_ he thought despairingly, but before he could sink too deep into recriminations, the barista reached out to gently touch his arm.

“Well in that case, did you want your usual or are you trying something new today?” Kíli asked softly and when Bilbo looked up in surprise, there was only kindness on the young man's face. Kindness and a bit of laughter, but the sort that invited the florist to join in, and it did not feel cruel when the other added with an impish smirk: “Though if you don't speak to me at all, it's going to be the coffee of my choice.”

This teasing threat finally broke through the florist's paralysis and he stuttered quickly in response, “No! N- no. Busy. I mean, you didn't do anything. I- I was just busy and my usual will be fine.”

“All right then, I'm glad to hear it,” the barista replied, regaining his earlier cheer as he rung up the other man's order. “But I believe you owe me an answer before I can give this tea to you.” 

“A- An answer?” Bilbo muttered in bewilderment, pleased that Kíli didn't seem to mind his stumbling but still feeling quite out of his depth. “An answer to what?”

“To my question from last Monday, remember? The one I asked you about uncle Thorin? You promised me an answer on the next time that we met. Which would of course be now.”

“Oh did I?” the florist asked, rather dazed by the shine of the young man's smile. He could hear impatient mutters from the few customers in line behind him, which only scattered his thoughts more, and he fumbled with his money as he pulled his wallet out. 

“Of course you did and I am shocked that I was so forgettable as that. But I will forgive you if you give me an answer now,” Kíli said with a dramatic sigh as he glared the mutterers into silence and with such a stalwart defender, the florist found his voice. 

“I- In that case the word you're looking for is yes, but only in the beginning,” Bilbo replied, finally beginning to relax and remember that he did actually know how to have a conversation. _It's just like talking to Thorin or a customer. A younger, more attractive version who changes subjects like the wind, but I can totally do this,_ the florist told himself, bolstered by the knowledge that the other man really wouldn't judge him for his awkwardness. 

“I'm glad to hear that; as you've probably noticed, my uncle is like a porcupine; spiky on the outside but with a gooey heart within and he could always use more friends to watch his back. But it's your turn now, so ask me a question and I will give you nothing but the truth,” the barista said, shooting him another blinding grin and before Bilbo could think better of it, he spoke his thoughts into the air.

“Are you always this happy?” he wondered with some incredulity, before ducking his head in embarrassment as he realized what he'd said. “That's not... I mean I didn't... Crap.” _So much for my skills at conversation._

But Kíli just laughed, eyes crinkling up with amusement and handed the florist his change. “I accept your question and I'll tell you the answer tomorrow, so try not to disappear on me again.”

“I didn't do it on purpose, you know. Life just... just got in my way,” Bilbo told him before taking his tea and fleeing to his table before any other ridiculous statements could come out of his mouth. The other man didn't seem offended by his hurried goodbye, giving him a little wave and a wink that made the florist stumble, and he settled into his standard position with a hopelessly dreamy sigh.

For once, he found the view inside of the cafe far more entrancing than the people walking past the windows since Kíli served the other customers and bustled around the counters with a surprising grace that was quite easy on the eyes. 

And while Bilbo would never have admitted it to anyone, he was rather pleased to see that the barista didn't smile quite as widely at anyone else, and thus his joy at seeing the florist again was probably not an act. So as long as he could stop making a total fool of himself every time they met, perhaps this friends thing would work out after all, and perhaps that tiny spark of hope which still flickered within his chest would win the day.

However, when Bilbo found himself lingering long after he had finished his tea, hoping for one more smile or bit of conversation, he decided that he was being ridiculous again. Indeed he was about to get up, return to his shop and try to put the young man's dimples out of his mind, when someone slid into the empty chair across the table.

It was Thorin again and as the florist stared at him in surprise, the older man placed another cup of tea before him. “On the house for one of my best customers,” he said with a small smile. “You must have had a rough week to keep from visiting for so long. Normally I could set a watch by your visits if I were so inclined, and I know Kíli can be a bit overwhelming sometimes.”

“Um, well, thank you,” Bilbo told him, shifting awkwardly as he took a sip of his new drink. He had never been one to talk about his troubles, but it didn't seem right to sit here in silence either, so he wasn't sure what he should say. Particularly since Thorin's nephew was most definitely not a safe topic of conversation with the kind of thoughts that were running through his head. Not that his mouth got the memo because the next thing Bilbo knew, he was saying: “He must have been exhausting as a child.”

Thorin chuckled and the florist had to remind himself to breathe when the other's mirth lit up his face. _Damn this gorgeous family, they're going to be the death of me._ But while the older man was undeniably attractive, Bilbo's appreciation was primarily aesthetic as opposed to the kind of urges which Kíli inspired and he shook off his daze to listen intently when Thorin began to speak.

“Exhausting, yes, you could say that. Kíli and his brother used to run their mother ragged, and me also if I was around. Absolute hellions, the both of them,” he said, the harshness of his words belied by the affection in his voice. 

“But for all the trouble that they caused, the lads were never malicious about it and they've mellowed somewhat as they've grown. Though Kíli still tends to forget that while he may be the unholy love child of the Energizer Bunny and a social butterfly, other people sometimes need to breathe before they speak, so don't be afraid to call him on it when he gets to be too much. He could use the practice and you'll have to learn to hold your own if you're going to be part of the family anyway; some of our relatives are just as bad as him. Or worse.”

This was more words than the florist had ever heard from the other man in one sitting so it took him a moment to realize that it was more than the thought of Kíli being mellow in comparison to anyone that was making him feel faint. 

_Wait a minute... Did he say..._ “Part of the family?” Bilbo squeaked, feeling rather overwhelmed by this turn of conversation. _Have I missed something somewhere?_ he wondered since last the florist checked, he and Kíli were most definitely not even dating and it seemed a little early for statements like that. 

However, Thorin didn't seem to think there was anything odd about his choice of phrase, answering the florist with a matter of fact shrug. “Of course. If you're going to be my nephew's... friend, then you're going to meet us all before too long. But don't worry about it now; if you can handle Kíli then you'll be fine and he won't throw you to the wolves without someone at your back.”

After dropping these bombs so casually, Erebor's owner left to deal with a new mass of customers and Bilbo sipped his tea slowly as he thought over the strange conversation which they just had. Yet while there were all kind of worrying implications buried in Thorin's words, the only one the florist chose to acknowledge at the moment was the other's tacit approval of whatever was going on. 

This was enough for now since thoughts of Kíli's possibly terrifying relatives and desires past friendship could wait for another day. So the florist was feeling rather optimistic when he walked back to his shop, giving Thorin a nod and his nephew a wave on his way out the door.

These Durins might be forward and exhausting and far too attractive for Bilbo's peace of mind, but their unbridled joy and welcome was also strangely exhilarating and the florist had a feeling that if they chose to adopt him into their ranks, he would never feel alone again.


	6. Call and Response

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our boys get to know each other.

Over the next few weeks, Bilbo and Kíli continued their odd game of twenty questions and gradually the florist grew comfortable enough that he no longer stuttered when they spoke. While he still blushed far too often, the barista never called him on it and Bilbo began to look forward to their conversations a bit more every day.

If nothing else, he found the young man fascinating and while most of the florist's questions were more normal than the first one, he always wanted to hear what Kíli had to say. So Bilbo learned that the barista was getting his Masters in Management Practice - “because someone has to take over from uncle after all” - and he was indeed almost always filled with happiness. He discovered that Kíli's favorite color was blue and his favorite dessert was pecan pie, but the young man hated all nuts by themselves.

Later on, the florist learned that Kíli was obsessed with archery and thinking of starting a club at UH since the school didn't have one and he had been captain of the team at ELU. “We even made it to Nationals a few times, though we always lost out to the guys from Mirkwood in the end,” he admitted and when Bilbo expressed an interest in watching him sometime, the barista lit up like a Christmas tree. 

Eventually the florist ventured into more personal questions and discovered that the other man had never known his father - “died before I was born you know” - but he thought the rest of his large extended family filled this space just fine. Kíli even happily admitted to being something of a mama's boy, saying that his mother was the best person that he knew, even if her choice of names left something to be desired.

In turn, the other man made his own inquiries and while he never once asked what the florist had expected, in his own way the barista slowly uncovered a picture of just who Bilbo Baggins was: sometimes shy, often snarky and fiercely protective of those few whom he considered friends.

First Kíli learned that the other man was only a few years older than him but had never been to college, instead taking over the family business when his parents died. However, the florist had never resented this turn of fate because he loved his job and had an entire library of books on interesting topics that he read when he got bored. The following week, Kíli discovered that morning fog made the other smile while rainstorms made him frown, though Bilbo liked to watch the patterns lightning made across the sky. 

Periodically, the younger man would give in and ask a more normal question, thus also finding out that the florist liked to cook but hated baking, enjoyed long walks and stargazing, and usually spent his evenings reading in his favorite chair. Finally, the barista asked Bilbo why he drank Jasmine tea every single morning and was told that despite his prime location, the florist disliked coffee of all kinds.

This last became something of a mission for Kíli because he refused to believe that the older man could really hate every type of coffee and he made it his goal to find a blend which the other would enjoy. So after this discussion, when Bilbo came in for his tea every morning, the barista would hand him a sample cup filled with some new exotic flavor for him to try. And every morning, Bilbo would drink this coffee and find great amusement in Kíli's disgruntled face when he said that it was not the one.

After the first week of this, all the regulars began to anticipate their interaction and would offer their own suggestions on the different blends they liked. Yet while the florist was normally wary of being the center of attention, everyone was so kind about it that this time he didn't really mind, and in truth, he began to look forward to hearing what opinions the peanut gallery would put forth each day.

So when Thorin pulled him aside and asked why he was continuing to go along with these attempts if he really hated coffee so very much, Bilbo just shrugged and told him, “It makes your nephew happy, doesn't it? And to be honest, now **I'm** kind of curious if he'll ever manage to find one that I like.”

Besides, it kept his mind off his own cowardly refusal to ask the younger man out, that strange line in their relationship which both of them kept shying from. Because even if the florist now considered Kíli his friend and they talked nearly every single day, the pair had yet to spend any time together outside of their respective shops. But while he would have liked to see more of the other man, what they had now was comfortable and safe and Bilbo just couldn't bring himself to change things and risk ruining it all.

Kíli had started dropping by Baggins' Bouquets to say farewell after his shifts and the younger man seemed to be facing a similar conundrum. Every few days, he would begin to ask a question only to pause mid word and after a week of this, Bilbo was dying to find out what the barista wanted to say.

True, it could be something innocuous, perhaps an invitation to hang out somewhere in the city that Kíli wasn't sure if he'd accept. However, the florist rather hoped that this nervousness meant something else, something better, even as he was surprised by the other man's uncharacteristic hesitance. Although Bilbo had to admit there was a difference between flirting and asking with intent, and he could hardly blame the younger man for being unwilling to cross the same line which flummoxed him.

Still, the florist was starting to wonder if they would ever make it out of this holding pattern or if they would just keep dancing around each other, cowards to the end.


	7. Taking a Chance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one you've all been waiting for.

Then one morning, Bilbo walked into Cafe Erebor and things did not go their normal way. First Thorin was standing behind the counter in conversation with his nephew and when the older man saw the florist, he muttered something something which made Kíli blush. The younger man looked up and met Bilbo's eyes but instead of smiling like usual, he simply flushed deeper, cheeks turning an adorable deep scarlet that caused the other man to walk into a chair.

By the time the florist managed to right himself and the furniture, the Durins had finished their conversation and Kíli was shoving his uncle towards the far tables in the corner. “-yourself useful and I'll do this my way,” the younger finished as Bilbo reached the counter, giving Thorin one last push and then turning to the florist with an apologetic grin.

“Sorry about that,” Kíli said, ringing up Bilbo's standard order before filling another sample cup. However, instead of handing it to the florist as he always had before, the younger man hesitated, eyes flicking over to where his uncle stood, and then he downed the cup himself.

 _What the hell?_ “You just drank my coffee” Bilbo said, mouth hanging open in surprise. _It's not fair to change the rules on me now. I was just starting to get the hang of this._

“Yes, I did. What are you going to do about it?” Kíli replied with a smirk, regaining his normal composure even as his words caused the florist to lose his quite completely. Indeed, the older man just stood there frozen, his mouth hanging open in shock, until the barista finally asked: “Well, are you going to try this new flavor of coffee or not?” 

It took Bilbo a moment to realize exactly what the other meant but when he did, he thought, _you know what, screw propriety,_ before leaning across the counter and kissing Kíli for all that he was worth.

The younger man's lips were just as soft as he'd imagined and when the florist finally drew back, the entire cafe burst into cheers as his cheeks flushed with heat. But it was hard to worry about embarrassment when Kíli was smiling at him like that, bright and happy and Bilbo whispered, “I suppose some coffee tastes all right,” against the barista's mouth. 

He simply laughed in response, saying: “I told you that I'd find one,” and when he leaned in again, Bilbo did not resist. The second kiss was as sweet as the first, the younger man sighing softly into the florist's lips as he pressed closer, and it was only Thorin's amused voice that finally pulled them apart.

“Take a break, nephew. I can manage on my own for a bit while the two of you sort yourselves out.” Kíli nodded quickly, taking off his apron and rushing around the counter before his uncle could change his mind. He held his hand out to Bilbo and when the florist took it, he led him toward the back of the cafe. 

The regular customers sent them off with one last round of applause and the older man had to blush again at the thought of how invested all of them seemed in his burgeoning relationship. But as the door swung shut behind them, those worries were replaced with a more immediate wonder when Kíli leaned in to kiss him once more. Bilbo couldn't believe that this was finally happening, but no matter how the florist blinked, the sight before him didn't change, and an exhilarating joy grew in his chest as the young man cupped his cheek.

“So I guess I should actually say it, shouldn't I? Bilbo, would you like to go on a date with me?” Kíli asked with another grin and while the florist knew exactly what his answer would be, he paused for a long moment just to make the other sweat. _Serves him right for all the anxiety he's caused me._

Only once a hint of uncertainty replaced the smugness in the barista's eyes did Bilbo relent and give him a smile of his own. “I would love to,” he said softly, lacing their fingers together. “But why did you finally ask today?”

“You can blame my uncle for that,” Kíli told him with a slightly embarrassed laugh. “This morning he said that he was tired of watching us dance around each other and if I didn't get my act together, he would do it for me.”

“That's slightly terrifying,” Bilbo replied, the idea of Thorin asking him out in his nephew's place making him twitch violently. “But I should probably thank him anyway because I was starting to think we were never going to make it here.”

The barista laughed again and pasted a look of mock offense upon his face. “Hey I would have managed it on my own eventually. Well probably,” he shrugged, putting the thought from his mind as he wrapped an arm around Bilbo's shoulders. “So when should I pick you up?”

“Pick me up? You already know where we're going?” the florist asked in bemusement. “Do I not get a say?”

“Of course you do... next time,” Kíli promised with a wink. “Trust me. I've been planning this for a while and I have the perfect surprise in mind. So does Friday work for you?”

“Oh all right,” Bilbo gave in. _Not like I have any ideas and this sounds like it should be fun. Besides, he's adorable when he's excited._ “But you're feeding me dinner too, so give me your phone number and I'll call you with my address when I get home. Pick me up at six thirty.” 

“It's a date,” the younger man said, kissing the florist on his cheek before grabbing a pen and writing his number on his hand. “Now I should get back to work before uncle gets annoyed.” 

When they slipped back through the door, most of the customers from that morning's show had moved on to other things, so only Thorin gave their reappearance any mind. When he nodded at them in amusement, the florist mouthed his thanks and then finally grabbed his tea and headed back next door.

Bilbo spent the rest of the afternoon humming to himself as he arranged bouquets and advised apologetic husbands on their wives' favorite flowers. Though he got a few odd looks and old Mrs. Stranthenberg asked what had him so happy, the florist simply could not stop smiling, and he wasn't sure that he really wanted to stop anyway. His smile only grew when Kíli came in to give him one more kiss before heading off to class and the florist whistled while he waited for the bus to take him home.

Over the next few days, Bilbo's phone rang more than it had in years and the florist started to wonder if he should actually get one of those mobiles that Gandalf was often on about. Although he had always refused before because he rather liked being unreachable sometimes, anything that would allow him to contact Kíli more often was starting to seem like a fantastic thing to have. For while they never talked about anything too important, the older man found that it was rather nice to have someone with whom to share his thoughts, someone who simply cared about how his day had gone. 

Their routine changed little otherwise, though they added kisses to their greetings and when Kíli was on his breaks, he often walked over to the florist's shop to chat. However, it was their coming date which filled Bilbo with flustered anticipation and he prayed desperately that the night would go well.


	8. A Gift from the Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Of course they can't have a normal first date, who are we kidding?

On Friday morning, Bilbo woke up with a stomach full of butterflies and as soon as he could manage it, the florist ducked into Cafe Erebor to try and find out what he should expect. However, Kíli wouldn't tell him anything, simply laughing and swearing that his lips were sealed, before distracting the other man from his questions with a kiss. 

Out of desperation, Bilbo even attempted to grill Thorin, but the barista's uncle just looked at him and smirked. “You'll have fun, I promise,” he said, before handing the florist another cup of tea and shoving him out of the door. “Try not to worry too hard.”

It was good advice but hard to follow, and so when the evening rolled around, Bilbo was afire with nerves. In fact, he found himself quite unable to sit still, changing his outfit again and again until forcibly reminding himself that Kíli had never seemed to mind his casual clothes before. But the florist didn't have too much time to work himself into a frenzy because at precisely half-past six, his date knocked on the door and as soon as Bilbo opened it, he had other things on his mind.

“I- I- What are you wearing?” he stuttered, hard-won composure utterly destroyed by the sight of Kíli, who was decked out in far too much leather for his peace of mind. It was positively criminal how anyone could look that good and it took a great deal of willpower for the florist to keep his eyes fixed on the barista's face.

“It's nothing special,” the younger man replied, honest confusion in his voice, although he did preen slightly beneath Bilbo's admiring gaze. “Just the leathers for my bike. You know, safety first and all that. Are you ready to go?”

“Uh, yes, ready, I'm ready. I just need to grab my coat,” he stuttered in reply, eventually managing to stop drooling long enough to think again. “...wait, did you say bike?”

“Yeah, my motorcycle,” Kíli told him, waving one arm toward the driveway and now that Bilbo was looking he could see a gleaming silver motorcycle parked right by his porch. “Isn't she beautiful?” his date sighed and while the florist did have to agree with the sentiment, his thoughts were more focused on how close together they were about to be.

 _Valar give me strength to survive this fantasy,_ he prayed, grabbing his coat, locking the door behind him, and following the younger man down his front steps. Kíli handed the florist a helmet and put on his own before hopping astride his bike, gesturing for Bilbo to get on behind him. 

“Watch the side-bags,” the barista told him as he swung a leg over the seat and settled himself gingerly, trying not to touch his date too closely. He was just so tempting wrapped in all that leather, but Bilbo refused to throw himself at Kíli before their first date had even started. However, his restraint was sorely tested when the other man looked over his shoulder with an elated grin.

“Better hold on,” he warned, snapping his visor shut and revving his engine, the purr of the bike vibrating all the way from the florist's head to toes. Then they were moving and Bilbo had to wrap his arms tight around Kíli's waist to keep from falling off. While the speed startled him at first, the longer they drove without crashing in a fiery inferno, the more the florist began to relax and enjoy the ride. 

It was a beautiful evening, the air crisp and cool as it rushed by, though with Kíli pressed in a long line of heat against his chest, Bilbo was far from being cold. He knew his face must be burning furiously, but as long as no one else could see it, the florist didn't feel embarrassed, so he just rested his chin on the younger man's shoulder and watched the cars go by. 

The pair was heading toward the outskirts of town and they drove for about twenty minutes before the motorcycle pulled up in front of an elegant old building. Bilbo hopped off and looked around while Kíli parked his bike, and to his surprise, he recognized exactly where they were.

“This is the planetarium, isn't it?” he said, turning to his date and raising an eyebrow. “I haven't been here in ages. But didn't it close an hour ago? I hope your plan doesn't include breaking and entering.”

“Closed is a relative term,” Kíli replied, taking the other man's helmet before grabbing a basket and a blanket out of the saddlebag on his bike. “But no, we're not doing anything illegal, I swear. One of my cousins works here and owes me a favor, so he promised to let us in. Now come on, this will be fun.” 

He grabbed Bilbo's free hand gently and pulled him toward a side door, knocking on it impatiently until someone shouted something indecipherable from inside. Kíli backed up as the door swung open to reveal an enormous man, tall and broad and glaring fiercely, and he looked nothing like the astronomer that the florist had been expecting. Indeed, the man looked far more like a criminal, but just when Bilbo was wondering if he should fear for his life, the man's craggy face split into a giant grin and he pulled Kíli into a hug.

“It's good to see you, you daft bugger. Still haven't learned any patience have you?” he said cheerfully while squashing the younger man against his chest and ruffling his hair. Kíli protested this encroachment mightily and Bilbo had to stifle a spasm of giggles at the sight of his wildly waving arms.

 _Absolutely adorable,_ he thought with a smile and it was nice to know that someone could throw the younger man off kilter just like the barista always did to him. Though eventually a snicker escaped and the cousin turned those dark eyes on Bilbo, who felt his shoulders straightening beneath that appraising gaze. 

But he just smirked at the florist's reaction and muttered to Kíli, “So this is the one who has you all tied up in knots. Aren't you going to introduce us?”

“Well I was going to, Mister Dwalin, before you decided to strangle me instead,” the younger man replied as he extricated himself from his cousin's embrace and straightened his clothes with a huff. Once Kíli had regained a bit of his composure, he hooked his hand back through the florist's arm and drew him forward. “May I present my date, Bilbo Baggins. And this is Dwalin Fundinson, one of my many cousins. He works here as a guard.”

Bilbo reached out and shook the other man's hand, relieved when Dwalin didn't try to squeeze his fingers or any other stupid test of strength like some of **his** cousins always used to do. Instead, he just shook firmly twice and then opened the door wider to usher the pair inside. 

While the florist still wasn't entirely sure about the legality of this, no one was likely to report them when the guard was on their side, and his curiosity was fast overcoming his remaining reservations. So he looked around in interest as Dwalin spread his arms and welcomed them to his domain, the arched ceiling of the planetarium rising high above their heads. In the low light of after hours, the exhibits seemed almost mysterious and Bilbo began to remember how much he had loved this place when he was young.

“All right, have fun you two. Just remember my shift is over at eleven so you have to be out by then,” Dwalin told them as he led the pair into the projection theater. “And if you need any help just let me know.”

Kíli thanked his cousin sincerely as he closed the door behind him, and then the younger man drew Bilbo toward the central stage. He lay down his blanket and gestured for the florist to make himself comfortable while he went to fiddle with the podium and finally the other simply had to ask.

“Not that this isn't neat, but what exactly are we doing here? And you did promise to feed me you know.”

“That's what the basket is for,” Kíli told him and the older man had to resist the immediate urge to peek under the lid. He had been one of those kids who always wanted to know what was inside his presents early and he was no different now. 

However, Bilbo managed to resist his curiosity for the moment, figuring that he should at least let his date do the honors, and he was distracted from the temptation when Kíli continued, “As for the rest, you'll see in a moment. As soon as I get this... where is... ah, there we go.”

Suddenly the ceiling exploded with light, the universe expanding all around them and Bilbo was so captivated by the stars shooting past that he the barely noticed when the other man sat back down beside him. After a few moments, the projection settled into a perfect image of their night sky, each constellation picked out in silver lights and it was almost as if he was out in the wilderness, stargazing with his parents once again.

“It's beautiful,” he sighed, leaning against Kíli's shoulder and the younger man's voice was almost hesitant when he replied.

“So you like it then?” he asked softly and once Bilbo turned to look at his face, he was warmed by the hint of uncertainty he saw. 

“Yes I do. This is perfect,” the florist responded and Kíli's expression lightened in relief. 

“Oh, good. I thought you might prefer seeing real stars, but there's so much light from the city around here that you can't see anything and I promised you dinner, not a ten-mile hike. Though sometime I'll have to take you out to my family's place in the countryside because the stars there are amazing, so bright you could almost reach out and pluck them from the sky. But, um, yeah. So I did promise you food, didn't I?” he blushed as he realized that he was babbling and turned to open his basket, but before he could, Bilbo leaned over and kissed him on the cheek.

“Thank you. I appreciate the amount of thought and nervousness that you put into this,” he said with a smile while the younger man looked back at him quizzically. “Well of course I did, you're worth the effort, you know. And you're happy that I was nervous? Why?”

“Because it means you cared enough to worry. I like confidence as much as the next guy but it's nice to know that you aren't assuming you have me all figured out. I hate it when people assume they know exactly what I want.” He'd had a few too many boyfriends who had done exactly that, planned his life out for him as though he were little more than an accessory to theirs.

Kíli was obviously surprised by his vehemence, but after a moment, his face softened and he clasped his hands gently around Bilbo's. “All right then, I think I can manage that. The way you keep surprising me, I don't think I'll have the chance to get complacent, but please tell me if I get too enthusiastic for your tastes. I know I can be a bit overwhelming sometimes, although I'd like to reserve the right to surprise you now and then.”

“That will be just fine and I like your enthusiasm, I promise. I don't mind being taken along for the ride as long as I get to pick the direction from time to time,” Bilbo was quick to reassure him because he didn't want old wounds to ruin this happiness he'd found. Besides, while the other did tend to bowl him over through his sheer presence, he never felt as though Kíli was taking him for granted or forgetting he was there. Rather it was more that the younger man thought the world was beautiful and wanted to share every little detail which caught his eye. 

_Though he can hardly drag me off my feet if we're running side by side, can he? And this is a journey that I want to take. But enough seriousness for now._ Indeed, Bilbo was sitting beneath a gorgeous starry sky with a picnic and a handsome young man on his arm and he planned to enjoy it while he could.

“That said, I think it's time for dinner. So what exactly did you bring?” he asked brightly and Kíli accepted the subject change without a fight, opening his basket to begin laying out their spread. When he was done, there was a little bit of everything there for them to try, complete with actual plates, silverware and wine. 

So for a while there was no more talking, just the clinks of forks and glasses and the occasional delighted moan on Bilbo's part. Kíli had managed to find all of his favorite foods, or at least the ones that went together well, and the florist was nearly bursting by the time he lay down his plate with a sign of satisfaction. He eyed the last bit of white chocolate mousse for a while before admitting that there really was no way that he could finish it, although this didn't stop him from feeling jealous when Kíli swiped it up.

 _I don't know whether I want to be him or that finger,_ Bilbo thought, watching the younger man lap the dessert off his hand and he quickly changed the subject in an attempt to hide his blush. “So, um, did you do all this yourself? It's quite an impressive spread.”

“Well, I could say yes, but that would be a lie. I can barely boil water,” Kíli told him with a laugh. “Another one of my cousins is studying to be a chef and I promised to help him move in exchange for this.”

“Well you can tell him that he's fantastic because I haven't had a meal like that in ages. Although, exactly how many cousins do you have?” he wondered idly as he lay his head in the younger man's lap and looked up at the stars. “I think you've mentioned at least four already.”

“It's actually a weird quirk of my family,” the barista explained, stroking a gentle hand through Bilbo's hair. “Technically I only have two cousins, but my brother and I also count all of Thorin's because it's too complicated to keep track of the different generations whenever the whole gang is hanging out. So I guess that adds in another five and we include the brothers Ri as well, even though I'm not actually sure how they're connected to the rest.”

“That sounds nice.” Bilbo murmured, wishing that his family could be as close as Kíli's sounded. “But speaking of cousins, Dwalin didn't seem all that surprised to see me. Have you told everyone about us already?”

“Well not exactly,” the other said sheepishly. “I mean I told my mum and my brother, and uncle already knew, of course. But I'm pretty sure the rest of the family has heard all about you because even though he doesn't look like it, uncle Thorin is a total gossip.” The florist gave him a wide-eyed stare at this news and the younger man continued quickly to take the worry from his eyes. “No, really, this is good thing, I swear. Uncle likes you so I'm sure he's only been complimentary and this way everyone gets to grill him instead of us. So hopefully by the time you meet everybody, they'll have gotten over their need to hover like a bunch of loons.”

The thought of meeting Kíli's entire family was mildly terrifying considering the way he tended to describe them, but at the same time it was nice to know that the younger man was thinking that far ahead. And it was nice to know that he saw nothing odd about bringing home a boyfriend, which was a hopeful sign for how his relatives might react. 

_Certainly better than mine did,_ Bilbo thought with a melancholy sigh. _Though to be honest, that isn't hard._ By this point it was nearing eleven, so he sat up to help Kíli repack their meal and soon the barista had him smiling once more. 

He was just so incorrigibly happy that it was contagious and their work went by quickly, even interspersed with kisses as it was. On the way out, the younger man told him to wait by the door and went over to the podium again, saying that he wanted to show Bilbo something else before they left.

So Kíli pressed a few more buttons and then the skies opened up, virtual rain pouring down the walls. He ran back to the older man's side to wrap an arm around him just as the thunder started, a deep and echoing rumble from speakers high above. 

And then the lightning came. Streaks of electricity flashing across the darkness of the ceiling and painting patterns against the lids of Bilbo's eyes. It was glorious, an endless chain of white lightning crackling in a latticework upon the sky, and it took the florist back to his fondest memories of watching storms with his mother on the porch. So he hugged Kíli tighter and blinked the tears back from his eyes, because the barista did not know what a gift this truly was.

Or perhaps he did. “One more good memory to keep you warm,” the younger man whispered when it had ended and Bilbo was nearly floating with joy as Dwalin led them out. He waved farewell to his cousin before hopping up on the motorcycle behind Kíli once again, wrapping his arms tightly around the young man's waist.

Their return trip seemed to take no time at all or maybe the florist simply didn't want it to be over, since he was flushed with food and warmth and happiness. But the younger man pulled up in front of his house soon enough and Bilbo had to say goodbye.

Kíli walked him to his door and kissed him goodnight, though when the barista turned to leave, the older man caught his arm. “Do you want to come in?” he muttered, somewhat startled by his own forwardness, and he blushed furiously when the other caught his eye.

“Do you want me to come in?” the younger man asked in return, reaching out to stroke Bilbo's cheek and the florist didn't know what he should say. He was hardly inexperienced but somehow this relationship felt different and he just didn't know if he was ready to cross that line again. So Bilbo hemmed and hawed and finally admitted the truth.

“I don't know,” he said with a helpless shrug, yet to his surprise Kíli didn't seem annoyed by his indecisiveness. Instead, the barista just leaned forward and kissed him with a smile. “Then not yet. But I will see my boyfriend tomorrow if he doesn't mind?”

“Boyfriend? I like the sound of that,” Bilbo replied, something in his chest easing at the other's casual acceptance of his hesitance. “Give me a call in the morning?”

“Of course. I'll talk to you then,” the younger man promised, giving him one last kiss before walking down the front steps with a wave. Then Kíli got back on his motorcycle and drove off with a roar of the engine, Bilbo watching him until he disappeared into the darkness of the night. Once he had disappeared, the florist slipped inside and shut his door, leaning back against it with a sigh. _I am so far gone,_ he thought, sliding to the floor and wrapping his arms around his knees as a silly grin spread across his face. _I am absolutely twitterpated and it feels fine._


	9. Too Fluffy for Words

As he had promised, Kíli called him early the next morning and the sound of his voice brought Bilbo's smile back full force. They talked for nearly an hour before the florist had to go to work and the younger man promised to stop by between classes if he could.

The thought of seeing his boyfriend later on, - _boyfriend!_ \- kept the older man grinning through three difficult customers and one romantic meltdown on the part of a husband who was late for his anniversary and refused to believe that there were no white roses to be found. However, Bilbo eventually managed to convince him that his wife would appreciate gardenias far more than waiting another hour and he was ushering the man out of the door when Kíli rode up.

“You're early, love,” the florist called out in greeting, his words dissolving into startled laughter as the younger man swept him into his arms. Kíli swung him around twice before setting Bilbo back on his feet and planting a quick kiss on his lips. 

“Well I just couldn't wait to see you. That's not a problem, is it?” his boyfriend asked, a hint of mischief in his eyes.

“Don't worry, I'm not complaining,” the older man replied with a smile of his own. “But I think we just scandalized Mrs. Gertrude across the street,” he continued, giving a cheerful wave to the old woman who was standing in her window and staring at them with mouth agape.

Kíli took one glance at her and started giggling madly, gasping out apologies between his howls of mirth. “Sorry, sorry. I just... did you see her face?” the younger man cackled as his boyfriend drew him inside the store. Though once she was out of sight, he settled down quickly, hopping on the stool behind the counter to watch the florist work. 

As much as Bilbo would have liked to ignore his job and hang out with the barista for a few hours, he simply couldn't afford to take the time off right now. However, Kíli didn't seem to mind if he made bouquets while they talked and to the florist's surprise, his female customers nearly doubled in the time that the younger man was there. 

It was rather ridiculous the way women kept walking by, glancing in the window and doing double-takes before rushing inside the store. His boyfriend wasn't even dressed like an employee, so the first time someone leaned over the counter with a sultry smile and asked Kíli about his favorite flower, the barista just stared at her nonplussed. After a moment, he glanced over at Bilbo who shrugged and mouthed, 'sell her some orchids'. Considering that the woman was definitely more interested in his man than his flowers, the florist figured he might as well give her the most expensive ones he had.

Besides, she looked like she could afford it and when she didn't even blink at the price, Bilbo knew that he was right. As soon as the woman left the store, Kíli broke into another fit of giggles and asked, “What the heck was that about? I probably could have sold her anything.”

“Some women like guys who like flowers,” the older man replied with a smirk. “Though your pretty face probably didn't hurt. Just remember who you're dating here.”

“I'm not pretty, I'm handsome,” his boyfriend retorted before leaning in for another kiss. “But don't worry, no well-dressed business woman is going to steal me away. No matter how rich she may be.”

Considering the number of women and odd man who tried to slip Kíli their numbers over the next few hours, from college freshman to octogenarians, it was good that Bilbo wasn't really the jealous type. He probably should be given his history, but if his past heartbreak had taught the florist anything, it was that cheaters would do their thing no matter what. In any case, the younger man was too innocently amused at his customers' flirtations to be taking them seriously and Bilbo didn't think his trust was misplaced.

So the florist stood back and watched the show, only intervening when one of his regulars arrived. Frankly Kíli was in his element, convincing these people to buy the fanciest bouquets with little more than a joke and a smile, and no left unsatisfied. Though some of these customers pushed it a little far.

While Bilbo could understand their interest since his boyfriend was ridiculously gorgeous and he certainly appreciated the extra money, if Mrs. Remington moved her hand any higher, there were going to be problems. However, Kíli must have been able to hear his teeth grinding from across the shop because the younger man detached himself carefully.

“Excuse me, ma'am,” he said, smiling politely as he backed away. “But I need to talk to my boyfriend for a moment. It is his shop after all.”

“Boyfriend? Are you sure about that?” she asked, lips curling down in a moue of disappointment. But when the younger man nodded firmly, Mrs. Remington conceded the point and wandered next door to drown her sorrows in an expensive frappucino. 

“Well this has been an interesting experience,” Kíli said, wrapping an arm around Bilbo's waist and pressing a kiss against his hair. “Unfortunately I do actually have to go back to class today.”

“If you must, I'll let you go for now,” the florist sighed before grinning cheekily. “Though the ladies are going to be severely disappointed.”

“Well they'll just have to live with the frustration because I have a boyfriend already and I'm rather fond of him,” the younger man replied in that ridiculously sweet way of his. “Besides, most of those women were nuts so I may have to stick to coffee from now on.” 

“Fair enough,” the florist agreed, escorting his boyfriend out the door. “Have a good time at class and I'll call you later; hopefully by then I'll have figured out what our next date will be.”

“I'm looking forward to it,” Kíli called as he drove off with a wave and Bilbo ducked into Cafe Erebor for a quick drink before continuing his work. Bombur was there again, taking his order with a knowing smile and the florist decided that the younger man must have been right about Thorin's gossiping. However, the redhead seemed to be happy for them and hopefully the rest of Kíli's relatives would feel the same.

The remainder of the day wasn't nearly as entertaining now that the younger man had left, so the florist had plenty of time to plan out what they should do. His boyfriend had set the bar high with their first date and Bilbo wasn't going to try to top him in ingenuity. 

Instead, he decided on something entertaining, something a little more lighthearted than their last one, which is how the pair found themselves whirling around on roller skates a few evenings later. Going to the rink might be a cliché but the smile on Kíli's face was worth it and it had been a long time since the older man had allowed himself to let loose like that. They joked and laughed and spun around like idiots and all told it was a very satisfying day.

From then on the couple went on at least a few dates a week, ranging from sweet and emotional to silly fun. Kíli took them hiking and bicycling when he wasn't surprising Bilbo with cooking classes and the florist managed a few surprises of his own. 

Once the younger man got his archery club started, the florist came to watch him practice and if he hadn't already thought his boyfriend was the sexiest thing he'd ever seen, this would have sealed the deal. He was beautiful in his concentration, the serious cast a sharp contrast to his normal cheer, and Bilbo had always liked men who were good with their hands.

Watching him shoot, the older man wondered if he was being stupid by making them wait because at the moment, he wanted nothing more than to feel those clever fingers on his skin. However, the time never felt quite right and this was one area where his past had scarred him deep.

Yet with every day they spent together, the florist felt his heart grow a little softer and while Kíli would steal kisses whenever possible, he never pressed for more.


	10. Braving the Horde

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kíli's relatives are an odd bunch.

Several weeks later the couple was finishing up another date, if you could call it that when they had simply curled up on Bilbo's sofa to watch old black and white movies in the dark. Casablanca had just ended and the florist was contemplating getting up when his boyfriend spoke with a false air of casualness, “So there's something I've been meaning to ask you.”

“Oh? What kind of something?” the older man replied warily, preparing for the worst. Conversations which started like this rarely meant anything good and although Bilbo tried to sound unaffected, he couldn't keep from tensing against Kíli's side.

His boyfriend frowned down at him in confusion for a second, before his eyes widened in sudden understanding. “What, no, don't freak out. Everything's fine, really,” the younger man promised fervently as he wrapped the florist more tightly in his arms. “Shit I should have phrased this better; I've just been thinking about it for a while and wasn't sure if you'd say yes.”

“Say yes to what exactly?” Bilbo asked again, not quite ready to let his doubts disappear even while he let the younger man pull him closer.

“Oh, well see. Uncle's birthday is next week and I know the two of you are friends so I was wondering if you would want to come to the party. I mean I'll have to make an appearance either way but I'd like to introduce you to everyone if you're willing. The whole family will be there,” Kíli explained in a somewhat convoluted ramble, looking at the other earnestly.

“You want me to meet your relatives?” the florist wasn't sure if he should be terrified or flattered by the suggestion, but at least he could stop waiting for a worse blow to fall. Truthfully it meant a lot that the other man cared about him enough to ask and so maybe it was time to take another chance.

“Only if you're comfortable, of course,” his boyfriend continued, backtracking slightly when Bilbo had been staring at him silently for a while. “If you don't want to face the crowd I totally understand but maybe you could still meet my mum and brother later on?” The younger man looked so hopeful and there was no way that the florist could resist those enormous pleading eyes. 

_How can I refuse him this when he's been so patient with me? It's not like he's asking something terrible,_ Bilbo thought and the way that Kíli beamed when he agreed was worth any nervousness.

Though when the florist found himself standing on Thorin's doorstep, this truth seemed rather far away and he gripped his boyfriend's hand tightly for support. He hadn't been expecting the house to be quite so large and intimidating, and if Bilbo survived this evening, he was going to ask Kíli just what Thorin used to do. However, first he had to actually survive the other's family and the florist had to fight to keep the friendly smile on his face as the front door swung open on a cacophony of sound. 

“Kíli! You're here and you brought your boy!” a voice cried out exuberantly and a second later, Bilbo was pulled into a hug. He didn't even have a chance to register who was talking before his face was mashed into their chest and it would be entirely unfair if the whole family was this tall.

Though his nervous irritation was overwhelmed by the urge to giggle when the florist heard his boyfriend whine, “Mum! Do you have to do that? You're going to chase him off.”

“Nonsense,” she retorted sternly, though she did at least draw back far enough for Bilbo to breathe. “If he were that easy to spook, he never would have lasted this long. I'm your mother remember, I know what you're like. Now introduce us, will you?”

“Fine,” Kíli conceded, drawing his boyfriend back to his side with a huff. “Bilbo meet my mum, Desmonda Prince. Mother, this is Bilbo Baggins of Baggins' Bouquets.”

“Durin dear, I went back to my maiden name, remember? But it's good to finally meet you in person Bilbo, I've heard so much about you,” Desmonda said, giving the florist a brilliant smile, and he could see where Kíli got it from. In fact, now that he could see her face, the similarity was striking for mother and son could have been twins if not separated by gender and age. She certainly managed to match his overwhelming glee. “Do call me Dís though, everyone does.” 

_Does everyone in this family go by some weird nickname?_ the florist wondered with amusement as he tried to find his voice. “Um, all right, ma'am. Uh, Dís. It's nice to meet you too.”

“Aww, isn't he sweet,” Dís replied, reaching out to pinch his cheeks before sweeping her son into a hug of his own. “Now come inside and meet everyone else so we can get this party started.”

What followed was a whirlwind of names and faces and it wasn't long before Bilbo was completely lost. There were Balin and Bifur and Dori and Dáin; Ori and Bofur and Glóin and another Thorin who went by Helmut for a reason that was never quite explained. The sheer mass of people was rather astonishing and the only thing they seemed to have in common was that their names were baffling and their grins were wide. 

At least no one appeared to hate him since with every introduction, the florist was drawn into hugs or handshakes as Kíli's relatives offered their congratulations on making it this far. Even the more familiar faces like Dwalin and Bombur winked and mouthed 'good job' from across the room. Honestly, it seemed like an odd thing to be supportive of since it made his boyfriend sound undateable, but perhaps they were simply happy that he hadn't run screaming yet. Because Thorin had been right about his family and some of them did make Kíli seem practically comatose. 

Considering the rest of his boyfriend's relatives, his brother was surprisingly restrained, shaking Bilbo's hand with a crooked grin and accepting his double-take in stride. The florist hadn't meant to be rude, but the two young men were as different as night and day and given how much Kíli looked like his mother, he hadn't been expecting that. The well-muscled blond before him might as well have been a changeling in comparison.

“I look like our father,” Fíli explained cheerfully, “It made for some difficult years when we were younger, but considering this lot, it's kind of nice to be the only blond. If nothing else it makes it easier to pretend that I don't know him when he's being embarrassing.”

Kíli reacted to this taunt in true little brother fashion and the florist watched the impromptu scuffle with delight. For all their differences in appearance, Kíli and Fíli were alike in other ways, and he could see their relation when they fought.

“Hopeless aren't they?” someone asked at Bilbo's side and he turned to see a redheaded teenager grinning up at him. “I'm Gimli, son of Glóin over there. Those two brats are my cousins.”

Over the course of the ensuing conversation, the florist discovered that Gimli was the one who had put together their stargazing picnic and took this chance to express his sincere appreciation. From there it didn't take long for the two to became lost in comparing their favorite recipes, and it was obvious that the redhead was quite skilled despite his age.

“I'm in the culinary program at UH with my boyfriend right now,” the teen explained, glowing with pride at being accepted to such a prestigious school. “He's going to stop by later if he can and I'll try to introduce you two. We'd like to open a local restaurant once we graduate, though it's going to be hard if his dad doesn't stop being a dick. Legolas keeps trying but the old man hates my family and so far he just won't give in. Snobby vegan bastard.”

“Oh!” Bilbo exclaimed in sudden realization. “You're dating Thranduil's son, aren't you? I knew your name sounded familiar. Some of my relatives dragged me to the Greenwood Hall awhile ago and I heard the two of them arguing. I'm sorry things are still so bad.”

“Nah, it's all right,” Gimli reassured him. “Legolas isn't going to back down so Thranduil will have to come around eventually. It's not even the vegan thing that's the biggest issue, since I know a number of perfectly nice alternative chefs, he just hates Thorin too much to like the thought of me.”

“Really?” the florist asked, always eager for more information about his silent friend.

“Yeah, the two of them were both lawyers back in the day, except they were always on opposite sides so there's some bad blood there,” the redhead told him with a shrug. “Uncle won't talk about what happened exactly, but after Smaug v. Erebor he decided to quit, and he seemed to blame it on Thranduil when I asked.”

 _A lawyer, huh? That certainly explains a few things. Like this enormous house,_ Bilbo thought before putting his curiosity from his mind. While he was pleased to finally know the basics, he wasn't going to do his friend the disservice of wild speculation, not when he knew how painful that could be.

By now, Fíli and Kíli had declared their competition a tie, or rather both were claiming victory, so the florist waded in to grab his boyfriend and go get a drink. “I'll get you next time Fílipek,” the younger man called out as Bilbo dragged him off, but his brother just waved him away with a rude hand gesture and the florist had to stifle a laugh at their antics as he poured himself some wine.

The pair wished Thorin a happy birthday before wandering around the party to chat with anyone who caught their eye. The food and drink were fantastic, one definite benefit to their host having money, and Bilbo soon forgot why he had ever been nervous at all.

Kíli's family was an interesting bunch of people, quirky and entirely unapologetic but highly entertaining nonetheless. Dís and Thorin were usually in the center of the chaos, holding court among their relatives with their stories and deadpan jokes. The more everyone drank, the crazier the tales, though the florist wondered if he had had a bit too much when he saw his deliveryman slip through the front door.

“Nori, what are you doing here?” he asked incredulously, rubbing at his eyes. But he couldn't have been hallucinating for the other man greeted Bilbo and Kíli with a cheerful wave.

“Me and my brothers are relatives of sorts, even if Dori's the only one who knows exactly how. So I came to get in on the fun,” the deliveryman told him as he hung up his coat. “I would have told you but you weren't dating my cousin when you hired me and it never seemed relevant later on.”

“Don't worry about it,” the florist replied with a tipsy smile. “Although I may have to hit you up for childhood stories now that I know. It'll make the deliveries go faster if nothing else.”

“It's a deal,” Nori agreed over Kíli's loud objections before Ori grabbed his brother to round out their Blackjack game. Bilbo was tempted to join them until he got a glimpse of the vicious way the Durins played – with the way they handled the cards it was rather more like Slap Jack – and there was no way the florist was getting in the middle of that.

By this point the wine and the late hour were starting to go to the Bilbo's head and he decided to take his leave before he made a fool of himself. Kíli had been nursing one glass all evening so he was still sober enough to drive and his boyfriend held him steady while they said their farewells. 

The wine and the warmth conspired to make the florist drift off on the ride home and he was nearly asleep by the time the pair arrived at Bag End. In this space next to dreaming, Bilbo found himself wondering what he had been so scared of, because now that he had met Kíli's family some truths seemed obvious. While his heart might still break someday, this loss would not be from betrayal and he did not want to sabotage what they had with doubt. So this time when his boyfriend walked him to the door and kissed him farewell, Bilbo did not let him leave.

“Stay with me tonight?” the florist asked, reaching out to grab Kíli's hand as the young man turned to go. These words brought the barista up short and he turned to stare at his boyfriend in surprise. But when the older man twined his arms around Kíli's neck and whispered, “please,” his whole face softened with delight.

“You're sure this time?” his boyfriend murmured against Bilbo's cheek, the soft touch igniting a fire in his skin.

“I'm sure,” the florist promised, before pulling Kíli down into another heated kiss. Once they stumbled inside, Bilbo kicked the door shut behind them and the last thing he said before he drew the younger man upstairs was a whispered, “I am very sure indeed.”


	11. Dirty Deeds Done Cheap

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why yes, this story does like to go on really random tangents, why do you ask? Though I promise there is an overall point in here somewhere.

Over the next few weeks, Kíli spent so many evenings at Bag End that he'd practically moved in and waking up curled in his boyfriend's arms never failed to put a smile on Bilbo's face. Indeed, he had not been this happy since before his parents died and even talking to Gandalf couldn't annoy him as it once did.

The florist should have known that such joy could never pass unchallenged. 

It was his relatives of course, a thorn in his side like always, for the Sackville-Bagginses had never been willing to let him be. Where the other members of his family simply pretended that they'd never known him, Lobelia always had to interfere and so Bilbo should have expected her meddling. However, she hadn't called in ages and his recent good luck had driven his cousin from his mind.

Which made it even more of a shock when Lobelia strolled into his shop one morning just after it had opened, looking around her as though she owned the place. 

“What are you doing here?” Bilbo asked, trying and failing to keep his annoyance from his voice.

“I have news, dear cousin. Difficult news and I thought that you should hear it from me instead of my lawyer,” she replied, her expression a false facade of caring that made the florist cringe. _If Lobelia's mentioning her lawyer, then this can't be good. The last time I saw him, she was trying to have my parents' will thrown out._

“News about what exactly? I'm still not giving you my house,” Bilbo said warily, not liking the avaricious gleam within her eyes.

“Oh no of course not, darling,” his cousin said, placing one hand on her heart dramatically. “It's actually about this quaint little shop of yours. You see, we all thought that your parents owned the building outright, but we were searching through some of our old records and that just isn't the case.”

“Bullshit,” Bilbo burst out. “I inherited the deed when my parents died and their names were the only ones on it.” 

“The only ones on the deed, yes, but there's the matter of this little contract to be dealt with,” Lobelia told him as she pulled a folder from her purse. “It seems my dear husband Otho helped them make this purchase and the whole matter just slipped his mind. You know how his memory is these days. So your parents may have been on the deed, but there's a standing debt that's owed.”

“Cosigned as equal partners... either owner may sell at any time... must be bought out at full market price by the other or property to be sold...” the florist mumbled, reading over the paperwork. With every line, the knot in his stomach grew tighter and by the time he finished, Bilbo felt like he would be sick. “There must be some mistake. If this were true you should have been listed on the deed, or at least mentioned it when their estate was settled. I don't... I mean... I could maybe do installments, but there's no way that I can pay you that kind of lump sum now.”

“We know, cousin. That's why I'm here,” Lobelia murmured, reaching out to pat his hand. “Obviously we don't want to take your business away from you, but a contract is a contract and debts must be paid. You have until the end of the month to come up with the money or I'm afraid that we'll either have to put this place on the market or start seizing your assets, starting with that lovely house of yours.”

His cousin swept out just as regally as she had entered, leaving the florist with this ultimatum and a sick feeling in his gut. There was no way Bilbo could pay his cousins off that quickly without selling Bag End, not with how real estate had shot up in recent years, and the thought broke his heart.

So when Kíli stopped by before his shift an hour later, he found the florist sitting at the counter with his head in his hands. Bilbo looked up at his entrance to give him a bleak smile and while the barista had been running late, all other concerns disappeared at the pain in his boyfriend's eyes.

“Bilbo, what's wrong?” the younger man asked, rushing to the other's side and beneath his gentle questioning, the whole story came pouring out: Lobelia's visit and her demands and the contract that started it all.

“It just doesn't make any sense,” the florist groaned in frustration. “This damn thing looks real enough to me, but why the hell haven't they ever mentioned it? Those two have been trying to get my house for years and I have trouble believing that they misplaced the paperwork for a decade, so their silence makes no sense. Unless Lobelia was just waiting for the worst possible moment to bring it out. That would be just like the bitch.”

“Are you sure it is real?” Kíli asked, eyeing the documents suspiciously. “I'm no expert but this whole thing does seem really strange. Tell you what, let me make a call and get someone down here to check it out.”

“A call?” his boyfriend asked in confusion, “You know someone who deals with things like this?”

“Love, haven't you noticed?” the young man replied with a smile, “My family deals in everything. But uncle Thorin was a real estate lawyer so this might as well be our specialty.”

“So are you going to ask him?” Bilbo said, feeling his hopes begin to rise for the first time since Lobelia had dropped her bomb. 

“Nah. If this contract is real then we'll go to him, because retired or not he should be able to represent you or at least find someone else who can. But we might not even have to ask depending on what Nori says. He's good with these sort of things,” Kíli explained before pulling out his phone. 

While his boyfriend made the call, Bilbo digested this new revelation, wondering what other surprises the barista's relatives had in store. Admittedly his new driver had always seemed a little shifty, if a perfectly nice guy, but this kind of specialized knowledge had never crossed his mind. However, while that Kíli's reaction was certainly unexpected, it was nice to know that his boyfriend had his back; the florist hadn't had any allies other than Gandalf in a very long time.

Nori arrived within the hour and he listened carefully as his cousin told him what was going on. Then he held his hand out for the folder, taking it over to the window to examine the documents while Kíli went next door to explain why he was late.

On his return, the young man brought Bilbo his usual order and the tea helped to calm the florist's twitchy nerves. So he nibbled on his muffin, the barista pressed against his side for support, until Nori finally looked up with a grin.

“Definitely a fake. It's a good one, I'll give them that, but there's no way this is as old as it claims,” the other man told them, pointing down at the Lobelia's contract. “The Shire didn't start using this style of seal until about nine years ago, which means that your father was already dead when this signature was notarized and your relatives no case.”

“Oh thank the lord,” Bilbo said, sinking down into his chair as his knees gave out with relief. “I owe you Nori, really. A bonus at least.”

“Don't worry about it,” his deliveryman told him, shaking his head. “You're family now and that's all there is to it. Besides, it's not all good news – even though this isn't real you can't do anything against your cousins unless you can prove beyond a doubt that they knew it was a fake.”

“Trust me, this is plenty,” the florist replied, still somewhat flabbergasted by the show of support. _Is this what families are supposed to be like? My relatives spend more time stabbing each other in the back for social standing than they do actually trying to help._ “It would be nice if I could make Lobelia back off forever, but I've been dealing with her for nearly all my life, so I think I can manage a few more years. If nothing else, threatening to reveal her duplicity to the rest of the family should make her wary of messing with me again.”

So Bilbo thanked Nori once more and allowed him to go back to whatever he was doing, convincing Kíli to go off to work as well. Then he called his cousin, using his store phone because there's no way she was getting his cell number, and told her the great news.

For once in her life, Lobelia backed down without a fight and that more than anything told the florist that she had known the truth all along. Though of course, his cousin pretended to be shocked at the revelation, promising to hunt down that poor notary and make him pay. Bilbo rather hoped that she didn't bother since he wouldn't wish her vengeance on even his worst enemies, although if the notary had known what he was doing, perhaps it served him right.

The florist actually hung up in the middle of Lobelia's tirade because once he was assured of his cousin's compliance, he didn't really want to listen to her anymore. After all, he had much more pleasant things to be thinking about, like that gorgeous boyfriend of his who would be on his break soon.

So Bilbo put this encounter from his mind and turned to help the frantic customer who had just walked in the door.


	12. Bitter Memories

Of course, Lobelia being Lobelia, this was not the end of her machinations, although the florist didn't find out that she was behind the call until much later down the line. Indeed, his first thought when he picked up the phone and heard his uncle Longo's voice was more of a curse than anything so coherent as to wonder why.

“Bilbo, my dear boy,” his uncle bellowed heartily, blatantly ignoring the fact that the two of them hadn't spoken since the funeral and didn't even like each other enough to send out generic Yuletide cards. “You will be coming to the family reunion next Saturday, won't you? The whole clan will be there and I know that they would love to see your face.”

“Um, what?” was all the florist managed to stutter out. This invitation was literally the last thing he expected and Bilbo would have been less surprised to hear that Otho and Lobelia were becoming humanitarians.

“The family reunion, son. It would be so nice if you could come this time,” Longo said, his attempt at sincerity sounding rather more like condescension.

“This time? You've had one before? I wasn't aware that I was ever invited to an event like that and I don't see why I should intrude where I'm not wanted,” Bilbo replied, putting a hint of bite in his words. This was the first time he had heard about any reunion and the florist knew well what his family thought of him.

“Oh come on now, you can hardly hold the past against us. It's not as though you had made the best life choices and we couldn't have such a bad example around the children when they were young,” his uncle explained, apparently not seeing anything wrong with calling the other man's entire life a waste. 

_This is really not how to make me change my mind,_ Bilbo thought, rolling his eyes in exasperation, but he couldn't get a word in edgewise while Longo rambled on. “... and you know that my brother was running for sheriff so being seen with one of your kind would have ruined his chances. But I hear that you've begun to turn yourself around so we'd love to see you there.”

“Fine, I'll check my schedule and let you know,” Bilbo promised, fully intending to make up some prior engagement if none arrived. 

However, when he mentioned the strange phone call to Kíli that evening, his boyfriend refused to accept his choice without an explanation. Although considering that the florist had actively avoided mentioning most of his relatives during the entire time that they had known each other, the younger man's question was rather justified.

“Wait, you actually have enough relatives to have a reunion?” he asked, turning to look at Bilbo in confusion. “I thought that you just had that one awful cousin. Why haven't you talked about any of them before?”

While his voice was even, there was a hint of uncertainty in his eyes and the older man felt guilt well up within his heart. Any doubt that Kíli was now feeling was the fault of the florist, because with everything that they had shared already, Bilbo should have mentioned this. It was only his cowardice which had kept him from speaking before and he owed his boyfriend more than that. So the older man opened his mouth to let the truth pour out.

“I haven't mentioned them because they're bastards and they hate me and I never wanted you to have to deal with that,” Bilbo said, the words stumbling over one another in a rushing tide. “They're the worst kind of high society vultures: completely obsessed with their image and they would sell each other in a heartbeat for a bit more power in their hands. My father was practically disowned by his siblings when he 'married beneath his station' and my preferences certainly didn't help to change their minds. I haven't seen anyone but Otho and Lobelia since the funeral because no one else would talk to me and those two just want to get my house.”

“So it wasn't that you didn't want them to meet me?” Kíli whispered, the hurt finally beginning to disappear.

“No, never. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me and I'd be proud to show you off,” the florist promised as he wrapped the younger man in a tight hug. “If anything I didn't want you to meet them. They'd tear you apart for dating me and I guess I was worried that you might start to see their side.”

“Sometimes you're an idiot, Bilbo,” his boyfriend responded, pressing a kiss to his cheek. “So it's a good thing that I like you as much as I do. You can't pick your relatives and I'm hardly going to let some bigoted assholes scare me off. Will you trust me on that?”

“I do,” the florist protested, before admitting with a frustrated sigh. “I just have trouble believing this is real sometimes. I mean you're just so... why would you stick with me?”

“You know what? We should go to this reunion of yours,” Kíli declared in what seemed to be a complete non sequitur. But he was entirely serious and as the older man stared at him in bafflement, he went on to explain. “That way you could see if all of your relatives are as bad as you remember and maybe you'd finally believe me when I say that I'd walk through hell for you.”

While part of Bilbo was pleased at the younger man's offer, none of his past asshole boyfriends would have ever considered that, the rest of his mind knew that _this is a terrible idea._ So when he finally managed to stop gaping long enough to find his voice, that is what came out.

“Seriously, this is a terrible idea. I can't even...” the florist trailed off, shaking his head. “They'd probably throw us out the instant we walked through the door and you shouldn't... You don't have anything to prove to me. I know I'm just being stupid and I don't need you to suffer through my relatives just to reopen old wounds. Because you can't fix everything, you know, and sometimes you shouldn't try.”

“Why don't you let me be the judge of what I'm willing to do,” Kíli replied obstinately and Bilbo was forcibly reminded why stubbornness was not always an attractive trait. “Besides, you went to meet my family even though the thought terrified you, why shouldn't I meet yours?” 

“Because your family is actually made up of decent human beings!” his boyfriend shouted in exasperation as he finally lost his temper. “But you know what, fine! If you want to have a miserable evening that badly, I'll call Longo back and tell him we'll be there at five with the rest. So when the bastards spend the entire night making snide comments behind our backs, at least I'll get to say I told you so.”

“Fine! I'll see you then,” the younger man growled in agreement before gathering his stuff and stalking out the door. He paused only to shout, “I just want to fucking make you happy, asshole,” before the florist heard his bike roar off.

Bilbo sank back onto the couch with a growl of his own, kicking at a cushion in frustration. _Stupid bloody-minded bastard. Why can't he just accept that some things suck and leave it at that? But no, he always has to be the fucking hero so now we're going to walk blindly into the viper's den and they're going to try to rip him to pieces. And he's either going to kill someone and end up in prison for the rest of his life or he's finally going to realize what a mess I am and dump my sorry ass._

That had been their first real fight and the florist's anger was quickly turning to misery as he replayed it in his mind. Even if Kíli was being stupid, _and he was_ , Bilbo knew that he had severely overreacted as well. 

So now he was committed to attending the damn thing, terrible idea or not, and he picked up the phone to call Longo before he lost his nerve. There was no way the older man was going to back down, not after the speech he had given, and he certainly wouldn't be the first to apologize. Though it was rather lonely to go to bed alone, trying to ignore the way that Kíli's toothbrush stared at him accusingly. Even Bilbo's mattress seemed too large now for all that he had slept in it for years and it was a long time before he managed to fall asleep.

Things didn't seem much better in the morning, if anything the florist just felt worse, and dragging himself into work that day was nearly impossible. Truthfully, he might as well have stayed in bed since no one wanted to buy flowers from someone who looked like his heart was breaking and and every time Bilbo checked his phone to see no messages, his heart sank a little more.

At least Kíli wasn't at the cafe that morning because seeing him would have sorely tested the older man's resolve. But for all that he didn't want to imagine losing his boyfriend, _if I can even call him that anymore_ , the florist refused to beg and they would resolve this as equals or not at all.

But the younger man didn't call him and so he spent several hours wallowing in his loneliness before he finally gave up and went home. At least there he could indulge his misery with ice cream and maybe tomorrow would be a brighter day. However, waking up alone sucked just as much the second time so when his phone finally buzzed, Bilbo shoved the bouquet he was holding into the window and rushed over to see what it said.

 _'I still think I'm right. But I'm sorry I hurt you and I want to understand. Can we talk?'_ The message read and for all its grudging nature, this apology made the older man laugh even as the knot in his chest began to ease. It was just so Kíli, brash and honest to a fault, and if the barista had been someone different, Bilbo wouldn't love him like he did.

Which was a revelation that the florist would revisit later on. For now, he simply typed: _'I'd like that. I still think I'm right too, but I may have overreacted a bit. My family has always been a touchy subject.'_

 _'Will you tell me why?'_ was the near instantaneous response and Bilbo flushed with pleasure at the knowledge that Kíli must have been waiting anxiously as well.

_'I'll try. There's so much history that it's hard to know where to start. They're just horrible, they've always been horrible and I can't see that changing anytime soon. You know Lobelia tried to get me to sign over my parents' house at their funeral? She couldn't even wait a fucking day and Otho was plastered as usual, not that I can blame him too much considering his wife._

_But they're all like that. Too caught up in social status and appearances to be decent human beings. When I was a kid, my aunts and uncles would drop by our house just to berate my father for his choices and they were always trying to convince him to leave my mother for some high class trophy wife._

_They don't even care that I prefer men, not really. I could sleep with as many men as I wanted and my relatives wouldn't bat an eye as long as I had an official wife to bring to social functions. Lord knows uncle Polo has never been particularly faithful but he's discreet and no one cares as long as there's no scandal. So really they're shallow greedy bigots who bend over backwards to accommodate public opinion and I don't understand why you would want to meet them at all.'_

It was strangely cathartic to write out this explanation, almost as though the resentment had festered and speaking of it lanced the wound. The distance of texting helped as well, giving Bilbo time to gather his words without pressure, and he felt lighter once this message was sent.

 _'All right, so they do sound pretty bad.'_ Kíli admitted after a long delay. Yet the florist should have known that the barista wouldn't give up so fast. _'And I know you won't want to hear this, but can you be sure that they're all like that? You said yourself that you haven't seen your relatives in years, so some of them might have changed.'_

These words made Bilbo want to lash out again, scream at the younger man to let the damn thing go. But that was what had gotten them into this mess in the first place, so this time he forced himself to stop and think about the other's words instead. 

_'Honestly, I don't know. Some of my second cousins were all right when we were children and Aunt Rosa married a Took so her kids were always a little different than the rest. But most of them are around your age now or a bit younger and I seriously doubt that they're any better than their parents were back in the day.'_

_'Don't you want to be sure before you give up on them completely?'_ Kíli wrote back and it seemed entirely unfair that he could sound so earnest in a text. _'I mean, my family drives me crazy sometimes but I know they'll always be there for me and if even one of your relatives might give you the same support, wouldn't it be worth finding out?'_

_'I'm not the one giving up on them! They abandoned me after my parents died and I know when I'm not wanted. Why should I risk being rejected again?'_ the florist typed back hotly, an echo of old grief flaring in his chest.

_'Longo did call you, maybe he finally wants to try. And if your cousins were just children when everything happened, they probably thought that you didn't like them anymore. Who knows what their parents told them after all? Just go this once and see what happens, please? I'll be there with you and if everything goes horribly wrong, at least you'll still have tried.'_

_'You're too damn convincing, you know that? You should have gone into politics instead of coffee because you'd have won everything. But fine, we'll give it a shot and I suppose it might be good to have some closure if nothing else.'_ Bilbo relented, knowing in his heart that his boyfriend was probably right. It would be nice to see Drogo, Adalgrim and a few of the others again, and if they truly thought that he had abandoned them, the older man needed to set the record straight. Besides, if everyone was just as horrible as he remembered, Bilbo could leave without feeling guilty and Kíli wouldn't be able to bother him about it anymore.

 _'So does this mean that I'm forgiven? Can I come in?'_ This text was accompanied by a quiet knock and the florist looked up to see his boyfriend waving hesitantly through the window of his shop.

At the sight, Bilbo couldn't help but smile and he gestured the other man inside. “Come here you silly bastard,” he said, wrapping the younger man in a hug and after a moment, Kíli relaxed within his arms.

“I really am sorry you know,” the barista murmured against his neck as he held on tight. “I don't like fighting with you at all.”

“Me neither,” the older man replied, determined to make things right again. “And I'm sorry I got so angry. I know you were trying to help and I probably did need to hear it – I just didn't want to. Maybe next time we have a disagreement we can try it without the yelling and storming off because I'm rather used to having you around.”

“Deal,” his boyfriend agreed, leaning in to seal it with a kiss. Somehow that turned into making out against the counter and while the florist was enjoying himself too much to stop, he did spare a thought to hope that no one was getting a show as they walked by.

However, eventually Bilbo's conscience got the better of him and the older man drew back with a reluctant sigh, knowing that he shouldn't let Kíli distract him like this. “As much as I would love to continue what we're doing, it should probably wait for later. I am supposed to be working and I really can't leave the shop unattended right now.”

“There's always the storage room,” his boyfriend told him with a cheeky grin, a wicked light shining in his eyes.

“You know, I do believe you're right,” the florist responded, unable to resist the temptation of that heated gaze. So he flipped his sign to closed and locked the door behind him before pulling Kíli toward the back. He had a boyfriend to ravish and if anyone needed flowers, they could wait 'til he was done.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They weren't actually supposed to fight this chapter so you can blame this angst on the characters. I claim no part of it. But we're finally heading toward the endgame now.
> 
> And this is somewhat unrelated, but has anyone else just said screw it and added all the dwarves' names into their spellcheckers? It's actually kinda handy because I don't have to go search the random diacritics anymore and this way it catches me when I misspell Thorin, which for some reason I do a lot.


	13. A Reunion of Sorts

Now that they were speaking again, Saturday came far too quickly and it wasn't long before Bilbo was standing before another terrifying door. While Thorin's house had been larger than the florist expected, this one was frankly ridiculous and he couldn't understand why Lobelia would want Bag End if she was going to inherit a mansion like this.

 _Maybe she just doesn't want to wait until the old bastard dies,_ Bilbo mused, clutching onto Kíli's hand for courage as the handle began to turn.

However, to his great surprise, the person standing before them wasn't Lobelia or Longo but a young woman whom he didn't recognize, at least not until she shrieked his name and threw herself into his arms.

“Dora?” he asked incredulously, staggering back beneath her weight. “Look at you, you're all grown up.”

“Yeah well, that's what happens when you disappear for a decade,” his second cousin replied, standing back to glare at him. “I mean I know the old crowd can be a bitch sometimes, but some of us would have liked to know that you were still alive.”

Kíli was grinning smugly at him but the florist couldn't be too annoyed with his boyfriend when Dora was making him feel so guilty about cutting all his ties. The older man stuttered out an explanation as best he could and while his cousin forced him to sweat for a while, her face eventually softened again.

“Well you're here now so I suppose I can forgive you. Though if you vanish again we're going to have words. Actually give me your phone number; give me all your phone numbers because I'm not letting you get away this time,” she demanded and Bilbo gave in without complaint. It meant a lot that Dora wanted to stay in touch this badly so when Kíli bumped his shoulder to catch his attention, the florist just grinned and rolled his eyes. His boyfriend would probably be insufferable for a few days but he had earned it and maybe would help to soften the reactions still to come.

“So anyway, who is this?” Dora asked when she was finished taking down her cousin's information and on the news that he was Bilbo's boyfriend, her eyes widened with glee. “Oh the old crowd is going to hate that. Good thing I'm the one who opened the door then or you might never have made it inside. But while most of your cousins are as bad as their parents, the Tooks won't care and neither will my brothers, though I'm not sure about the rest.”

“Well that's something,” the florist replied, steeling himself to follow her inside and trying not to wince when all eyes turned their way. Bilbo hadn't expected quite so many people to be at this reunion, but it seemed that his clan had only grown in the time that he'd been gone.

After what felt like an eternity, Longo and his wife Camellia stepped forward to greet their nephew, staring down their noses at Kíli the whole time. However, once that painfully awkward introduction was finally over, the situation began to look up. Because while the other aunts and uncles refused to speak to Bilbo for bringing his boyfriend, his cousin had been right about the younger generation.

The Tooks started it of course, Adalgrim hugging the florist tightly before introducing his young children, two adorable balls of energy just into the toddling age. Then Dora dragged the pair over to her siblings, Drogo and Dudo greeting him with some of their sister's glee for here were two more people who were glad he was alive. Drogo's girlfriend Primula Brandybuck also turned out to be a sweetheart, which helped to take some of the sting out of the fact that neither Prisca nor Posco could do more than wave under their father's watchful eye.

Though Posco's girlfriend Gilly snuck over for introductions and she nearly had a heart attack when the florist drew his boyfriend to the fore. The young woman was apparently something of an archery nut and declared herself Kíli's biggest fan, going into a rant about nationals that Bilbo didn't even pretend to understand.

“Don't feel too sorry for him. He knows that Mirkwood won their last tournament fair and square,” a soft voice declared from near the buffet table and although Gilly bristled, Kíli just laughed when he saw who it was.

“Legolas!” the archer greeted, grinning widely as he patted the blond on the back. “What the devil are you doing here?” 

“Dad was hired to do the catering and so of course he dragged me along. But I'm glad that you're here too; it's nice to see a familiar face amidst all this high society and we haven't really caught up in ages. Though I suppose I can't blame you for being somewhat AWOL since you started dating him,” Legolas replied, sending Bilbo a friendly grin. The two had yet to have a proper conversation but Gimli seemed to have chosen well and if nothing else, it took a certain kind of stubborn crazy to date a Durin and survive.

“You're right, but this probably isn't the best place for that unless you want to get in trouble again,” Kíli told him, ignoring the interplay between the blonds. For all that the old crowd wasn't talking to them, they certainly liked to stare and one of them would probably tell Thranduil if his son started slacking off. “Do you mind if we wander away for a bit?”

This last was directed to his boyfriend and Bilbo was about to say that it was fine when Legolas spoke up again. “We can't abandon him to these people and you know it, Kíli. Why don't the lot of you come into the kitchen and I'll get you some decent food to eat?”

Drogo and Dudo seemed rather nonplussed by this invitation, while Gilly was still staring starry-eyed, but Dora accepted for the group and his second cousin had them all moving soon enough. She waved off her father's frown with an airy, “Going to give Bilbo the tour,” in order to deflect suspicion and the older man felt much better once they had passed out from under the old crowd's judgmental eyes.

His younger relatives seemed to feel the same since as soon as the door to the main room swung shut behind them, his cousins transformed into completely different people. Lighter, happier and far more open than they had been before and the florist finally understood that he wasn't the only one who found this family a heavy weight to bear.

Even Dora, as irrepressible as she was, relaxed visibly and started grilling Bilbo on the years he'd been away. Though when they got to his boyfriend, she just let her cousin ramble, watching him with a hint of amusement on her face.

“I like him, cousin,” she whispered once the florist finally trailed off, nodding toward Kíli who was chatting with Primula about her job. “He has more life in him than most of our in-laws and he seems to make you happy.”

“That he does,” Bilbo told her, looking at Kíli with a fond smile. “I haven't been this happy in a long time.”

“Good. I think we could all use a bit more love in our lives,” she said solemnly before breaking out in a wicked grin. “He doesn't have any hot single relatives does he? Someone looking for a little fun?”

“Well I should warn you that his family is absolutely crazy in their own way, but most of them are also ridiculously attractive. So I could ask,” the florist offered with a shrug, before reaching out to tap his boyfriend's arm. “Hey, is your brother single? Inquiring minds would like to know.”

“Fíli? Last time I checked he was too busy becoming a lawyer to have time for dating, so I guess so,” Kíli replied, slowing down to walk by Bilbo's side before quirking an eyebrow and asking, “Why?”

“Just curious,” Dora told him with a grin and before the barista could interrogate her further, Legolas announced that they had arrived. _This house is seriously ridiculous if it took us that long to walk to the kitchen,_ the florist mused, but he had to admit that it was impressive nonetheless. Because the room was truly enormous, full of fancy professional equipment which he didn't even have a name for and caterers running to and fro.

The blond led his group to an unoccupied corner, settling them around a table before running off to grab some trays. When he returned, Legolas swept off their covers with a flourish and presented his prize.

“Here we are. Homemade chicken rolls with feta and bacon, from my personal stash. I always bring some food along with me when father makes me work these things, so that I don't have to eat this other crap,” he explained, flopping down gracefully onto another kitchen stool.

“Bacon? You are awesome,” Kíli exclaimed, reaching for the tray and the rest of the group quickly followed suit.

“Of course, bacon. It tastes fantastic and there's no food guaranteed to piss my dad off more,” Legolas said, unbuttoning his waiter's jacket to reveal the t-shirt underneath. Bright pink with dark red letters, it read: _Join the dark side, we have bacon,_ and the teen smirked at Bilbo's startled laugh.

Now that everyone was well-fed and comfortable, the reunion was far more pleasant and the florist was soon caught up in the discussion going round. He had a decade of gossip to catch up on with his relatives and the more he learned, the more the older man decided that he liked this bunch. 

Even if most of his family was still horrible, finding this small group of friends was worth dealing with the others and when there was a break in the conversation, he leaned toward Kíli to whisper his thanks. His boyfriend just tugged him closer to his side and kissed him gently on the cheek before going back to discussing archery with Legolas, and Bilbo blushed beneath Dora's knowing grin. 

Somehow they spent hours there, his cousins leaving periodically to check on the main party and ensure that they weren't missed. Adalgrim joined them briefly to grab some snacks for his children before taking the youngsters home and the florist was impressed by how his once feckless relative took to fatherhood. Awhile later, Drogo managed to sneak Posco back into the kitchen, the young man rather annoyed with his girlfriend but pleased to see the florist nonetheless. Or at least he was once he realized that Gilly's infatuation with Kíli was entirely one-sided and Posco agreed to pass his cousin's greetings to his sister as well.

But eventually the party started winding down and their assorted parents began to wonder where their brood had gone. So the cousins exchanged contact information and promised to stop by Bilbo's shop sometime, before heading back into the lion's den.

As much as the florist would have liked to leave immediately, he knew that he should at least attempt to greet the old crowd before never talking to them again. This went about as well as he expected, but at least Bilbo could say that he had tried and keep his conscience clear. Then once his duty was completed, he was finally free to go.

So he gathered Kíli, taking his boyfriend by the arm and waving farewell to the gathered Bagginses. The party would probably go on for at least a few more hours, if only so Longo could prove that he was able to entertain in style, but the florist had had enough. 

While this reunion had been surprisingly pleasant, dealing with his relatives still made him rather tired and Bilbo needed time to process what had happened here. He needed time to get used to the idea of having family back in his life and the older man was quiet as they prepared to go. Kíli seemed to understand his silence, filling the space with a comfortable chatter until his words suddenly cut off with a choked cry.

The florist turned sharply at the sound, his boyfriend's name rising in his throat. However, before the words could escape into the air, the world went dark as a bag swept over his face. He struggled, trying to reach Kíli but whoever held him had a grip of iron and when something slammed into Bilbo's head, the older man dropped like a stone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For anyone who cares, while I fudged the ages a bit, all of these people actually are relatives of Bilbo's. I am also aware of who's actually a second cousin vs. 1st cousin once removed and all, but I got tired of writing those which is why everyone defaulted back to cousin or aunt in there end.
> 
> And with this chapter I just passed 310k on Ao3 so I'm feeling rather accomplished at the moment.


	14. Tied and Bound

He woke slowly, wondering hazily why his brain was hurting before he felt the ropes around his wrists and it all came rushing back. The florist jerked up and looked around frantically for Kíli, only relaxing once he saw his boyfriend slumped against the wall. It took a moment to figure out how to move with his limbs bound together, but Bilbo eventually managed to shuffle over to the younger man and nudge him in the side. 

“Fuck, what happened?” Kíli groaned, prying his eyes open to stare at the florist blearily. “Did I crash my baby?”

“I'm not sure exactly; someone grabbed us outside of the reunion, though I can't imagine why,” Bilbo explained, helping the other man sit up. His boyfriend seemed to be regaining his senses quickly and once the barista was clearly not going to pass out again, the florist relaxed enough to look around. The pair seemed to be in some kind of warehouse, likely abandoned given the amount of detritus, and whoever had grabbed them was nowhere in sight.

“We've been kidnapped? Fuck, uncle's going to kill me,” the younger man groaned before stiffening with an angry growl, “And they better not have damaged my fucking bike.”

“Priorities, Kíli, I rather think we have more important things to worry about right now,” Bilbo told him, shaking his head in fond exasperation. “You know, like the whole part where we might be about to die.”

He couldn't keep his voice from quavering slightly on the last word and his boyfriend turned to look at him with concern. “Hey, we'll be all right,” the younger man said, leaning against him reassuringly. “They're probably planning on getting a ransom for us so we should be safe for a while at least and mother will tear this town apart in order to get us back.”

“Maybe,” the florist conceded grudgingly, though he wasn't really prepared to be comforted right now. “But what's going to happen when they discover that I don't have that kind of money and I certainly don't know anyone who would pay it in my place?” 

“Well then it's a good thing that your boyfriend's family is filthy rich, isn't it?” someone replied as a door swung open and Bilbo jerked when he recognized the voice.

“ **Lobelia!?** ” he asked incredulously, craning his neck to look over his shoulder. It was definitely his cousin, all smug five feet of her; she hadn't even bothered to wear a mask. “What the hell is going on?”

“You know, I wasn't originally planning on asking for a ransom. I was simply going to stage a kidnapping gone wrong and claim Bag End upon your tragic death,” she explained calmly, no more emotion in her voice than if she were discussing the weather. “But when you brought your boyfriend to our party, I simply couldn't resist the opportunity. How could I when Killigan Prince, younger heir to the Durin legal empire, had fallen into my grasp?”

“Um, what?” Bilbo gaped, turning to look at Kíli who just shrugged uncomfortably.

“Uncle was a really good lawyer, okay? So there might have been a lot of money floating around for investment back in the day, plus mum and Fíli are still practicing now. But they've never let me slack around all day like some spoiled trust fund baby and it's not as though you asked,” the younger man told him, shoulders hunched defensively.

“Fair enough,” the florist agreed amiably after taking a moment to process this revelation and he could almost forgive Lobelia's actions for the chance to see that gobsmacked look on Kíli's face. 

None of the things he liked about his boyfriend had anything to with money, though it might be nice to eat out a little more often, and Bilbo could hardly blame the younger man for keeping this truth to himself. He was probably used to gold-diggers trying to get their hands on him, which meant that there was something the florist had to say.

“You do know that I would love you anyway, right? Even if you were poor as dirt with nothing to your name,” Bilbo told the other earnestly. While this wasn't exactly how he had wanted to make his declaration, he might not get another chance, and he needed Kíli to know the truth before the end. The soft smile spreading across his boyfriend's face told the older man that he'd made the right decision, their cantankerous audience notwithstanding, and he leaned in for a gentle kiss. 

“I love you too, you know,” Kíli whispered when they parted and the florist wanted desperately to take his boyfriend home and show him how much this meant. Though of course the whole kidnapping thing rather ruined that.

“Great, well you're sickeningly sweet and all, but I do have a deadline here,” Lobelia cut in impatiently. “If I don't get Lotho's debt to Saruman paid by the end of the month, I am going to have major problems and my time is running out.”

“Wait, that's what this is about?” Bilbo asked, looking up at their captor. “If your son owes this guy some massive amount of money, why didn't you just ask Longo for help instead of trying to steal Bag End? He certainly seems to have the cash to spare.” 

“Don't be an idiot, cousin,” the woman sneered as she waved to someone outside. “My father-in-law is mortgaged to the hilt just like all his siblings - which of course I only found out after I married that useless drunkard Otho. I wanted your house because I deserved to get something for my trouble but with Lotho's current idiocy, I can't afford to sit around waiting anymore. So while it's unfortunate, you're going to have to die.”

It was strangely comforting to know that Lobelia was a bitch through and through because at least the florist didn't have to feel sorry for what had gone wrong in her life. However, since dying was not on his agenda, Bilbo was also rather terrified and the man who entered the warehouse did not help.

He was enormous: tall, muscled and white as a ghost with piercing blood-red eyes and there was no kindness in his gaze. There wasn't really anything at all, just a blank indifference to their fate that was somehow more chilling than anger could have been. Lobelia called him Azog, ordering him to stand guard while she made the ransom call and Bilbo shifted uncomfortably beneath that scarlet stare.

The florist wanted to fight, to do **something** other than sit here and wait for death, but there was no way that he could take on the albino even with his hands unbound. He could see the same frustration in his boyfriend's eyes when he turned to look and his heart sank at the knowledge that neither of them had a plan. So for the lack of anything better to do, Bilbo started rummaging through his pockets as best he could, looking for a piece of gum.

 _I don't know why they didn't search us better but if I'm going to die, I'm going to die with minty breath,_ the older man thought in a burst of irrational defiance before his fingers closed upon his prize.

He popped the gum into his mouth and offered a piece to Kíli, wondering if it would be uncouth to play _I Spy_. But there wasn't exactly a whole lot else for them to do and Bilbo really didn't want to be stuck with his thoughts. Finall,y he just figured, _fuck it_ , and leaned over to kiss his boyfriend again, because there was nothing like making out to distract his mind.

It took the younger man a moment to get with the program but when the florist pressed forward insistently, he opened his lips with a sigh. As always Kíli was hot and welcoming beneath him, his mouth tasting of coffee and cinnamon, and he whimpered as Bilbo's fingers dug into his hips. The older man dragged his boyfriend closer, one hand tangling in his hair to slant their mouths together filthily. Soon there was only the wet press of their skin, Kíli's moans filling his ears and if they were anywhere but here, Bilbo would have had him half-naked by now.

Sadly, they were not and while he managed to ignore the yelling for a while, it was a little more difficult when Azog dragged the two apart.

“Okay, seriously, enough of that!” Lobelia shouted, pulling out a gun from somewhere and waving it around. “I can see that keeping the both of you alive is going to be far more trouble than it's worth and I really only need the boyfriend to make this plan succeed. Which means your time is up.”

She raised the weapon to aim at Bilbo's head and he would have bolted if there had been anywhere to go. But the florist was pressed between the wall and her pistol, and he refused to let this bitch see him cry. So the older man raised his chin defiantly, holding tight to the fear within his chest as he met Kíli's panicked gaze. Though his boyfriend was struggling violently in Azog's grip, the man could not be budged and all Bilbo could think was that he did not want to die like this.

Yet there was nothing to be done so he tried to smile bravely, hoping to show the younger man everything that he would never get the chance to whisper anymore.

“Bilbo!” his boyfriend screamed as the gun went off with a sound like thunder and the florist's knees gave out. To his surprise there was no pain, only the ringing in his ears, and he wondered hazily if that meant he had already died. But then there were hands upon his shoulders and he had to open his eyes if only to discover who was shaking him.

He could not have been more startled by what he saw. Because it was Kíli kneeling in front of him, eyes filled with worry and mouthing Bilbo's name. Behind his boyfriend, Lobelia was surrounded by uniformed officers and Azog was laying stunned upon the ground. Dwalin, of all people, stood over the albino, a wicked looking blade resting against his neck and when he saw the florist looking, the security guard gave him a feral grin.

“My boys!” Bilbo's attention was drawn away from Dwalin by the frantic shout and he looked up to see Dís running toward them, the rest of Kíli's family not far behind. And not only them, but several of the florist's cousins were there with them, Dora and her brothers nearly crying with relief.

“How did you find us?” his boyfriend asked, looking up at his mother as she enveloped both of them in a hug.

“Legolas saw Azog grab you while he was taking out of the trash and the dear boy called your uncle immediately. So once we realized that these idiots never bothered to turn off your phones, Dwalin had Nori triangulate the signals for us to track you down. We would have been here sooner if we hadn't had to get the police involved because the bureaucratic bastards refused to accept that we wouldn't stay behind,” Dís explained, glaring over at the officers who were reading Lobelia her rights. “I'll deal with them later, but that bitch is going away for a long, long time. I promise you that.”

“While I'm glad to know she won't be able to bother us again, at the moment I just want to go home,” her son replied, leaning against Bilbo with a sigh. “Do you think someone could drive us over or do they need our statements now?”

“I'll take you myself and the police will wait until tomorrow if they know what's good for them,” his mother promised fiercely. “Though you should reassure everyone that you're okay before you go because all of them were worried sick. And while you do that, I'll ask Fíli to drive your bike back to your apartment so you'll have it there.”

“I said home, mum, not my apartment. Bilbo will tell you where to go.”

It took the florist's shell-shocked mind nearly a minute to realize what Kíli was saying but when he did, he could not stop the lovestruck grin from spreading across his face. His boyfriend matched his smile, leaning in to press their foreheads together and Bilbo knew that the two of them would be all right. 

Dís watched this exchange with an indulgent smile, overjoyed to see her boys so happy together, even as she pulled out a camera to record the moment in their family history. “All right, then, home it is.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just the ridiculously fluffy epilogue left now. And I told you things would work out all right.


	15. Fourteen Months Later

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just over one year later, Kíli and Bilbo are still going strong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we're finally done. Thanks to everyone who's stuck with me this far; I hope the ending doesn't disappoint.

Bilbo was going to be late and his cousin was going to kill him.

The florist checked his watch for the third time in as many minutes, staring down the road like that would make his bus magically appear. But of course it didn't and he muttered to himself, “Shit. Just shit. If the next one doesn't show up soon, I'm never going to make it in time. I'm already cutting it close as it is.”

He hadn't meant for his errand to take so long but somehow the minutes had slipped away from him and the florist had forgotten how annoying it could be to take the bus. Or rather, how annoying it was to arrive at the bus stop just in time to watch his ride zoom away like a race car, even though the driver must have seen him waving there. But assuming the next bus actually came on time, Bilbo shouldn't be more than a few minutes late and its not as if the family needed him to shout, “Surprise!”

Though just as he was thinking this, his phone buzzed in his coat and he opened it to read: _'This may be Kíli's graduation party but he's going to be pissed if his boyfriend isn't there. Where the heck are you?'_

Dora's impatient tone came across quite clearly through the text, a talent that her cousin was actually quite jealous of, and he quickly typed out his reply.

 _'I'm on my way, I promise, I just missed my coach. So don't let anyone freak out too much. But my errand was successful so the plan is good to go.'_ Bilbo wrote, patting his pocket in satisfaction as the next bus finally pulled up.

 _'Good.'_ His cousin responded. _'I'll tell Fíli to distract his brother a little longer but you're going to be in big trouble if you don't get here soon.'_

The florist twitched at the implied threat in her message, sending off a fervent prayer that nothing else would delay him because Dora was rather terrifying when she was mad. But even if his cousin drove him crazy sometimes, Bilbo would not have given up their relationship or his regained family for anything.

Because suddenly he had kids to spoil rotten, Adalgrim's adorable little brats always running underfoot. Suddenly the florist had cousins who actually wanted to see him, Dora and her siblings dropping by the shop and hauling him off on family outings whenever he had the time. Kíli would also come along if he didn't have classes and the first time that the younger man managed to drag his brother out of the office to join in the adventures, their relatives gotten along even better than Bilbo had hoped.

Indeed, Dora and Fíli had hit it off like a house afire and while no one was sure if the two of them were actually dating, the pair was now inseparable. _Honestly, I don't think that they know either,_ the florist snorted to himself as he watched the city roll by. _But at least they seem to be enjoying themselves even if their silence on the matter is driving Dís insane._

Bilbo rather thought that annoying his mother was half the fun for Fíli because he had learned that his boyfriend's brother hid a wicked streak as wide as Kíli's beneath his placid face. However, while this meant that the two of them were holy terrors together, the florist rather enjoyed the chaos that their machinations brought. There was just something so entertaining about watching the Princes blow through the world like a hurricane and leave a score of wide-eyed strangers in their wake.

Besides even if the older man had once been just as flabbergasted by the brothers, after nearly two years of this, Bilbo was used to Kíli's antics and he could settle his boyfriend down with little more than a pointedly raised eyebrow sent his way.

Though the florist usually didn't bother to rein him in since that wild spirit was half of what he loved about the younger man while the other half was the sweetness buried beneath that manic energy. Kíli still surprised him sometimes with how truly attentive and openly affectionate he was to those he cared about. After years of rarely touching anyone, this was a balm on Bilbo's heart and he loved the evenings when his boyfriend would curl up with his head in his lap. The younger man would doze there, sprawled across the couch like some sort of giant cat and purring deep in his chest as the florist stroked fingers through his hair.

Truthfully, Kíli was just a ridiculously cuddly guy at heart, always throwing one arm around Bilbo when they were together and wrapping around him like an octopus at night. Though some of this might be residual protectiveness left over from their kidnapping since neither of them had wanted to be alone after that.

Even with Dís taking care of Lobelia as she had promised, the florist had spent several weeks jumping at every shadow and his boyfriend hadn't been much better. So eventually Kíli had simply given up all pretense of keeping his own place and moved in with Bilbo to keep an eye on him, a development which made Primula and his mother squeal with delight. That pair was rather too invested in the couple's continuing relationship but at least they only meddled during business hours and respected the fact that Bag End was off limits to the game.

Anyway once Fíli and Dora had started their strange pseudo-courtship, this took the heat off of their relatives and Kíli had been overjoyed at the chance to tease his brother back. So truly life had only gotten better once Lobelia had been dealt with and sometimes the florist wondered if he should thank her for how great things had turned out.

Though, in all honesty, he never wondered that for long.

Because Bilbo knew that it was really Kíli who had transformed his life and now that his boyfriend had graduated, it was time to make their relationship more permanent. _Assuming that he'll have me,_ the florist thought, still nervous despite all that they'd been through. But his stop was coming up so Bilbo just patted his pocket one more time to check that his prize hadn't fallen out somehow and then pulled the request cord.

Thorin's house was only a short walk away from the bus stop and the time was just ticking over to six o'clock when he jogged up the steps. Dora must have been watching for him because she opened the door nearly the moment that her cousin knocked, grabbing his arm and dragging him inside.

“Come on, come on. Kíli's on his way and we need to get you ready,” she said and before Bilbo could blink, he was swept upstairs to change. Apparently his normal clothes weren't fancy enough, which seemed silly since it was a party not a prom, but it wasn't worth arguing with his cousin when he knew he wouldn't win. So the florist bowed to the inevitable and if this night did not turn out like he hoped, at least his depression would be well-dressed.

Though the older man did grab his coat back for a second to rescue the box in his pocket, handing it to Dora with a solemn nod. She knew the plan and thought it was stupidly romantic so Bilbo could count on his cousin to get things sorted out.

He had barely finished dressing before he was dragged back downstairs to hide and the florist ducked behind the couch just as the door creaked open. So despite his worries, he was there to surprise Kíli with everyone else and Bilbo had to admit that the effort was worth it when he saw the delighted look on the younger man's face.

“Congratulations,” he murmured, hugging and kissing his boyfriend lightly before making room for the rest of the family to offer their own praise. Their assorted relatives surrounded Kíli en masse, patting him on the shoulder and shouting out their approval until Dís barreled through the crowd.

“I'm so proud of you,” she said as she hugged her son tightly, giving him a smacking kiss on each cheek and then ushering him into the dining room. “Now there's food and cake and presents from everyone so you better have fun tonight.”

“But first a toast!” someone shouted from the back of the pack and seconds later Bilbo and Kíli were standing in the front of the room with glasses of wine in their hands. Dora had given her cousin a wink when she handed him his glass, the signal that the plan was good to go, and so the florist was too filled with nervous anticipation to hear Balin's speech. Which was a shame since it was probably beautiful and Bilbo would have to ask someone for the cliff notes later on.

But right now he was busy watching his boyfriend drink champagne and the older man knew the exact moment when Kíli discovered the ring within his glass because it was written on his face. First confusion and then delight and then... laughter? 

_That is not the reaction I was expecting,_ Bilbo thought as the younger man started giggling madly but before he could walk off in a huff, his boyfriend grabbed his arm and gasped out.

“Finish your drink, love and then you'll understand.” 

So the florist gave Kíli the benefit of the doubt and gulped his champagne down quickly, only to stiffen in surprise as something heavy bumped into his tongue. _What the heck?_ Bilbo thought, wondering if Dora had gotten their wine glasses mixed up. But when the object was revealed to be another ring, one which the older man had never seen before, the barista's laughter suddenly made a lot more sense.

“Well we are a pair, aren't we?” Bilbo chuckled, slipping this ring on his finger with a grin. Then he wrapped an arm around his boyfriend, no fiancé, and kissed him with all the joy he felt inside. “But I'm going to take this as a yes, if that's all right with you.”

“I don't know how else you'd take it,” Kíli replied with a beaming smile of his own as he placed the florist's ring on his hand. Then he kissed the older man one more time before calling out to the rest of the room, “Hey everyone, Bilbo and I are getting married.”

What followed was a whirlwind of congratulations, hugs, and handshakes from which only a few clear moments stood out: Dora and Fíli's smug smiles since the two of them had known it all along, Thorin's quiet happiness and Legolas' slightly jealous stare. Though Dís' reaction took the cake rather handily by simultaneously threatening both of them with the other's happiness, promising dire consequences if either managed to screw up.

Once the furor had died down a bit, Thorin clanged a knife against his glass to gather everyone's attention and then declared, “I have an announcement of my own to make, though first I want to congratulate my nephew and his florist once more for finally making it this far. I've been expecting this announcement ever since Bilbo first walked into Cafe Erebor and Kíli went googly-eyed, but I'm glad that I was here to see it happen.”

“ _Thorin!_ ” the barista groaned, blushing furiously beneath his uncle's indulgent smile. But all his annoyance was forgotten as the other man continued with the rest of his speech.

“Which brings me to what I want to say. Because I've decided to leave Cafe Erebor to go traveling again and I intend to name Kíli as manager in my place. You've worked hard over the last two years and I think you can handle the responsibility while I'm gone. So think of this as a trial run and if you do well, I'll see about making things more permanent when I get back.”

“Uncle, you are awesome,” his nephew burst out, rushing over to hug the older man tightly and Bilbo watched them with a smile of his own. This was the best possible outcome that the florist could have imagined because he had been slightly worried about what Kíli would do now. Besides, having the younger man next door for good would make syncing their lunch breaks so much easier and hopefully cut down his phone bill as well.

So he joined in heartily when Dora proposed another toast, refilling his glass and raising it up high. “To the future,” Bilbo called out, clinking his glass against Kíli's with a contented grin. “May life always look this bright.”

Though the florist nearly snorted champagne down his shirt when the younger man leaned over to whisper in his ear, “Aren't you glad that you tried my coffee after all?”

 

_End_

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by this [prompt](http://hobbit-kink.livejournal.com/1990.html?thread=1212102).


End file.
